What about now?
by Amari412
Summary: Rusty, a wolf-dingo, has learned to live on his own after he's separated from the young human who loved him most. When Aleu finds him on her territory, the pack is at first suspicious of this newcomer. But can Aleu open Rusty's heart once again to love? And what secrets does he keep from her and everyone else? Aleu/OC. Rated T for language and some minor violence.
1. Prologue

**Prologue**

_Shadows fill an empty heart, as love is fading…_

He was alone again. Always. Hadn't he always been alone? No, not with his family he'd not been. Not with _her_. She never would've abandoned him. Never. But by now, she probably thought he was dead.

He at first prayed to whatever deity would hear him to kill him, be it by wolf's fangs or bear claws, he didn't care. But now he was stronger. He lived by the ways of the wolf, he had to. It was a part of who he was, so why not let it consume him when he was most vulnerable, most needy?

She'd named him Aubrey, after her father, but when he was a pup, he'd been named Rusty by those that had taken in his mother and himself. He'd always hated the name but now it was all who he was. Aubrey, the dingo, was dead. Rusty, the wolf, was all that was left. And everyone knows one thing about a lone wolf: he was either a survivor or a savage.

This strange wolf was a mix of the two. He'd survived much, lived long, and now lived a savage lone wolf life. At first it'd bothered him, but now he no longer cared. No one cared for him anymore, so why should he have cared for anyone except himself? The meekness and docility that was once his nature had long since fled, as it inhibited his ability to survive.

But why did he still allow himself to hope? Why did he yearn to return to her, to find the one he once loved and prove that love he had for her still burned true to his very being? It was superfluous in every sense of the word. More than likely she'd never recognize him, not with his coat in the condition that it was or what he'd become.

He'd hurt her and he knew it.

No! A part of him screamed, he wouldn't! He couldn't! Not after the kindness and love she'd given him, the first he'd ever received from a human. But he knew, if a human would approach him, he'd kill them, plain and simple. They were as irrelevant as his heart had been once. Since being separated from her, the heart was no more than an engine that kept him going. He no longer _felt_ anything.

Rusty stood atop of a high snow ridge and sniffed the air. There was caribou nearby, he could smell them. Perfect. He hadn't eaten well in almost a week, surviving on small animals like squirrels and the occasional rabbit or two. A caribou would last him a fairly long time, as he didn't eat much to begin with.

He followed the scent like he'd followed _her_. Rusty pushed her to the back of his mind. It was a time long since dead. He'd survived enough that he got along fine without her. He didn't need her anymore. Rusty had his instinct, his very will, and that alone was enough.

Rusty's heartbeat quickened as found the herd grazing through the light snow that covered the earth. All he needed to do was find one that was either sick or injured. Easy pickings, that was how he lived now. The wolf-dingo kept low, watching them on his rise. He couldn't smell any sickness, he couldn't see any injured. But Rusty knew it was impossible. There had to be at least one with some kind of defect that would give him an advantage.

Rusty moved away from his ridge, trying his hardest to stay hidden, or at least look uninterested. The caribou watched him regardless, always on the alert for predators. Rusty rolled his deep brown eyes.

"Screw this!" he thought, "Just attack one and hope for the best, dammit. You're better than this!".

He listened. The wolf-dingo turned and ran at the grazing heard with very wolf like swiftness. Most of his length was in his legs thankfully, the paws not as big as a wolf's but definitely bigger than a dingo's. Rusty caught up with a caribou quickly and had to take it down just as fast. He leaped, closing his eyes and of course hoping for the best.

His fangs hit their mark: the caribou's throat. Rusty held fast, his jaw and fangs strong as any wolf's, his teeth digging deep enough to almost pierce the larger animal's windpipe. But he wasn't as strong as he once was and inevitably forced himself to let go. It didn't matter, Rusty didn't despair. The caribou's neck was bleeding profusely, and soon it would be dead and his for the taking.

All he could do was wait as he tumbled into the lose snow, turning some areas of his red-brown coat to white. Rusty laid there, feeling slightly tired from his efforts. But he'd done it. Despite it all, the caution he'd had before wasn't necessary…

Like his heart.

Rusty heard the last pained cry of the caribou and pulled himself up. He shook the snow off himself and ran back to the carcass, ready to enjoy his hard won meal. For him, it was just another sign that he'd survived.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

_From all the things that we are, but are not saying…_

Rusty hid the caribou body under the snow, where he'd dug furiously. Like most of his kind, he was an avid digger, and was surprised that at least most of the remains fit into the hole he'd made. Once he was satisfied with his work, the wolf-dingo covered the hole back up and had to decide what to do next.

That was what was hardest about being wild, being "free". He never really knew what to do with his freedom, if he could call it that. For him it still felt like a prison, a prison of the mind. Most of the time, he would hunt, sleep, maybe go for a walk around the little territory he kept for himself, and then sleep some more.

Dreams were his relief. In his mind, in his sleep, he wasn't Rusty, he was Aubrey once again. He was hers once more, doing what he was born to do: To protect his beloved human. There was nothing now left of her, of his beloved Madeline. Well, there was one thing…

There was a chain around Rusty's neck, a chain of what appeared to be bronze, but was only so in color. It was small, looked like it was beaded in some places, but they were metal as well. On this chain hung what humans called a key. The key was hidden within his chest fur and the chain was hardly noticeable under the long unkempt fur of his neck, and the rest of him. It had been hers, but she trusted him with it. How odd, a human's trust. It was so hard to get, harder to keep, yet so easy to break.

When he got separated from her, did he break her trust? Did it hurt? Did she miss him? Did she think of him like he did of her, however needlessly? Something swelled in the wolf-dingo's heart as he thought of those questions, but he swallowed it.

"Don't think about it" the wolf in his mind said, "It's pointless. She's just a human. She never cared for you. No human ever did".

It wasn't the truth, and that's why he couldn't bring himself to be rid of the key around his neck. It was the only thing that held him together now, a reminder of who he once was. But if it wasn't the truth, why did he find himself believing it? Rusty sighed and shook, as if that would get rid of his thoughts. God, how he wished he could turn his brain off even for just a few minutes.

Rusty wandered aimlessly, not really paying attention to where he was going. The coniferous forest around him just seemed to stretch on forever, as far as the eye could see. The scent of pine mixed with sap and snow were abundant here, but it mixed with another scent too, one he didn't precisely know, but was slightly familiar with, if it made sense.

It was the smell of a pack. A relatively large one, but a pack regardless. Rusty had stepped off his territory and into another. He wasn't alarmed anymore than he was curious. He'd never set foot outside his territory, and so this was new. He'd always been curious, and it usually got him into trouble, but this time, Rusty found he didn't care.

And what if the pack spotted him? Well, he lived a good life. He was only four, but it was good, not long. In dingo packs, if one stepped off one's territory and was spotted, it was punished in the highest degree: Death.

"So be it" he decided. Not like he had much to live for anymore.

The wolf dingo allowed himself to venture further, taking in as many scents, and as much information, as he possibly could. The pack was about maybe twenty or thirty strong, unusually large to someone like him. Then again, his kind were mostly solitary, only running in packs when it was necessary or within advantage to do so. The alpha was a female, which caught him even more off guard. Honestly, what kind of pack was this?! Sure, there were dominant females in a dingo pack, but they never ruled alone. How could this one female keep order over a pack of about thirty members?! God, the stress of it all must've been massive! She had no mate, he could tell from certain scent markings, but that she was mild mannered, and slow to temper. She wasn't looking for a mate, but was certainly, at least Rusty believed, to be courted.

Ugh…he was too old for that nonsense. At a fresh age of four years old, he was well beyond the courting and mating years. Besides, he was solitary, a loner, a survivor and a savage. What would anyone see in him anyway? Hell, if his Madeline saw him now, even she would've turned away in fear! Rusty scoffed and continued to make his way further into the territory. He knew he should've turned back, gone back to the plain he learned to call home. But it wasn't just that simple anymore. Curiosity had driven him here and now he was bent on learning all he could about these neighbors he'd never seen or heard. Or maybe just never bothered to see or hear. Either way, there was no turning back now.

Rusty continued on, daring to mark this tree and that one, but not with…urine. Far from it. The wolf dingo had the pride to say that he was a little more sophisticated than that, thank you very much. Instead he clawed the trees and then flicked his tail across the scratch, which still left a scented signature for anyone who was curious. Not that many really took the time out to look anyway, but still…it was a precaution.

It was a shame he didn't notice he was already being spied on. The neighbors had smelled the strange creature's scent the moment he set foot in their territory. The hidden wolves followed the strange, lithe wolf (or dog, they didn't know what this stranger was in all honesty) with the red-brown coat and white underbelly. They were appalled as he dared to leave his mark on trees they assumed were theirs. This creature was surely a villain, and a threat to their new leader.

Silence reigned. Rusty noticed it too soon, and had his suspicions that someone was watching him. Try as he might, the wolf dingo couldn't shake the feeling. Damn curiosity to hell, he knew now was the time to turn back. They knew he was here, and he knew it too. A twig snapped and immediately his red-brown fur stood on end, making him seem larger than what he actually was. He snarled, the white of his fangs greatly contrasting the deep ebony of his lips. His claws scraped the ground, as if he were sharpening them. That was the benefit of being part dingo, they at least used their claws in a fight, while wolves used mostly their fangs.

"Bring it on" he said aloud.

A group of five large wolves came out from hiding. Rusty jumped out of the way of the first two, causing them to collide mid-air. He landed on all four feet gracefully, but stiff legged and tail out. His ears were sharp, and up in triangular points. In this moment, he truly was a wolf. All traces of the dingo in him faded away, if only for this moment. He was a wolf. A strange colored one, but one regardless. Rusty stood his ground, for he'd been in fights like this before and still managed to make it. Now would be no different.

A wolf came out at his left, lunging, fangs glistening and eyes blazing in anger. Rusty ran ahead, climbing over the two other unconscious wolves, and jumped away from them. He latched on to his attacker's throat and used his curved claws to hang on as he was shaken. Rusty's grip loosened and he felt himself get thrown towards a tree. His claws scraped into the ground, stopping him from crashing into it. Instead he seemed to practically jump off of it and pushed the attacker into a tree, delighting in the sound of a snap. With enough force, he'd broken the wolf's spine.

"Survivor or a savage" he thought to himself.

The fourth wolf caught Rusty mid thought and knocked the wolf dingo off his feet, sending him rolling down a nearby hill. He'd gotten scratched by a few branches along the way, but it was nothing too serious. Clever…it'd been years since anyone had gotten him down like this. The two last wolves came charging down the hill as Rusty regained his footing. The original attacker once again charged into him, but used his head as a means to hit Rusty in the jaw and sending him flying temporarily upwards where his companion easily took him down mid air.

The skin around Rusty's neck was thick, thicker than a wolf's thanks to his dingo heritage, so he hardly felt his opponent's bite anymore than a slight pressure. If he didn't have it, he probably would've been dead. Rusty was flung against a tree by the first attacker, but not hard enough to break bone like he had. His vision became fuzzy, but even so the wolf dingo tried to stand, but with much difficulty.

"God, this guy just doesn't give up!" the original attacker commented.  
"What the hell is he?"  
"Hell if I know. Let's just get this over with and kill him before he kills all of us".  
"HA! Kill me?! Oh please! I've seen birds more intimidating then you, mate" Rusty stood, fangs bared, vision still unclear, "Survivor or savage…make your pick".  
"The hell's he talking about?"  
"Which are you? Or are you too scared to answer yourselves? I know I had to ask myself that question a long time ago. I've lost everything, so kill me if you can for all I care! If you let me live, you better watch your back because somehow or other I will end you".

"ENOUGH!" a powerful female voice sounded from atop the hill.

Rusty and the two wolves looked up to see a light brown she-wolf at the top, looking down at them. Her eyes were a strange blue color, like that of a husky. Rusty went wide eyed. He wasn't the only hybrid out here! Granted she wasn't what he was, no, but a hybrid nonetheless. His assumption was that she was the leader of this pack and his incredible sense of smell proved his theory correct. Not to mention she had an authoritative air about her, something he'd only seen in alpha wolves. There was no questioning this young girl. She was queen, and what she said went. The ice blue eyes fell on Rusty.

"Who are you? What are you doing here?"

The wolf dingo kept his silence. Never in his life had he answered to anyone except his Madeline, and he wasn't about to break that unwritten law. Rusty held his tongue and gazed at the young alpha defiantly.

"Your name!" she demanded, sliding down the hill to him.

To this he replied only with a growl. He regretted it the moment he did it. The girl moved faster than a shark attack. She pounced and knocked Rusty off his feet furiously, anger burning behind the blue of her eyes. Without batting an eyelash, the alpha bit into the wolf dingo's neck and this time he felt it! God the girl had a bite to kill for! Stronger even than his! Rusty mentally took note of that. She was strong, and proceeded to attempt to drag him around as the pack cheered their alpha on. But Rusty kept his feet and claws firmly in the ground, so the girl had difficulty moving him. On top of that, he was fairly heavy, but if he were lighter, she would've easily tossed him around like a worn slipper. At last, she finally got him on his back, in an alpha position over her opponent.

Instinct kicked in. Whenever a wolf or a dingo was dominated, he or she had no choice but to obey what their dominator commanded. She snarled, and growled low in her throat. The message was clear as day: I AM THE ALPHA. Rusty breathed hard, or at least attempted to when she put her paw on his neck. She would've crushed him and there was nothing he could do to stop her, not at this rate. To his shame, he was completely at the mercy of this wolf-dog.

"Your…name" she said between growls.  
He hesitated but then looked her in the eyes. "Rusty…those who know me call me that".


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

_Can we see beyond the scars, and make it to the dawn? _

He stayed lower than the alpha, a low growl rumbling in his chest. But he wouldn't dare attack. He couldn't, not when he was forced into submission like this. The wolf dog stood over him, and finally let him up. Rusty didn't dare look directly at her, as it would mean he was challenging her.

"You realize you just killed one of my best hunters, right?" she asked after watching him for a few minutes.  
Rusty threw her a solemn glance. "There are two kinds of wolves, dogs in this world. Survivors or savages…and your friend certainly was no survivor".  
"You're the one who's savage".  
"And yet I don't deny it. Why should I deny what I am? In order to survive, I have to be savage here in a world like this".

What was wrong with this creature? The alpha, named Aleu, watched this twisted creature as he moved, his head and tail low. He was strange in both behavior and appearance, and perhaps that was part of what made him so alluring: His mystery. His coat was mostly red-brown in color, with what appeared to be a black stripe on both his shoulders. His belly fur was pure white and his eyes brown in color. He was so…long. Literally! This one wolf, this…Rusty, he had to be the longest, most lithe wolf she'd ever seen in her life. That didn't mean he was thin, mind you, but he had a good balance of muscle and bone, graceful, but strong. He was curious to look at, and even curious to listen to.

His voice had a roughness to it, but there was something of a softness behind it. Like he'd been soft once before, but now…something had happened, something had changed this creature. There was a slight hint of an accent Aleu didn't know in his voice. British? No, too thick…

"Where are you from?" she asked.  
"Is this your way of an interrogation?" Rusty countered.

Why the hell was she all of a sudden so curious about him? Before she'd viciously dominated him but as they locked eyes, it seemed like her whole demeanor changed. Her anger fled for a moment, giving way to something of…pity (which made him only growl more) and then simple curiosity. He didn't want her pity, or her curiosity. Personally he wanted to get the hell out of dodge, but in this situation, he didn't see a solution coming anytime soon.

"It's called an introduction" Aleu answered.  
"You're not going to kill me? I just killed one of your wolves…shouldn't you be slaughtering me at the moment?"  
"I'm not like you".  
"And what's that supposed to mean?"  
"I'm not the kind of wolf that gives our kind a bad name".  
"I'm not just a wolf, love. Far from it".  
"Neither am I".  
"Oh I know. I can tell by looking at you".  
"However you're right. You do need punishment".  
"As if you can punish me".  
"I think I just proved I can" Aleu raised an eyebrow.  
"I can't attack you. You're an alpha and I'm just…a loner".  
"Well now you don't have to be. You can replace the one you killed".

Rusty looked horrified. Pack life wasn't for him, he determined that long ago. He couldn't be trusted in a pack, and that much was obvious by the looks of shock and surprise on the other wolves' faces. There was no way the pack would agree to this. Then again, she was the alpha. She was queen, and whatever the queen said went.

"What's the matter, Rusty? Afraid of a little company" Aleu challenged.  
"Who are you? I've had to tell you my name and yet I know nothing of you".  
"I'm Aleu, daughter of Jenna and Balto, husky and wolf dog. What of your parentage?"

She had almost a challenging look on her face that roused his own curiosity again. Dammit, didn't it get him in enough trouble today? But at the same time, he knew this could be quite entertaining. Rusty was sure she was just dying to know, along with her pack, what exactly he was.

"And I am Rusty, son of Kajura and Takkon…Dingo and wolf".

Whispers and mutterings surrounded him, mostly negative. They spoke of his heritage, called him weak, dirty blood, and, most irritatingly, baby eater. God…he had nothing to do with the incident from years ago that had given his kind a bad reputation. A dingo had snatched up a baby when the parents were gone or something and had eaten it. Now he assumed wolves thought of dingoes as baby eaters…oh joy…

As for Aleu, it explained a lot about this newcomer. His accent was, as she recalled, Australian. But she wondered if he'd ever actually been there. This creature was getting more and more curious by the minute. What kind of life had he known? What was his family like? Aleu, make no mistake, was still angry at this stranger for trespassing on to her territory and then had the nerve to kill one of her wolves, and she believed her idea of punishment was reasonable. It was better than dipping her fangs in blood, like he did.

"Well Rusty, I'm not giving you a choice. You're one of us, whether you like it or not".  
"Yeah, right…you can't hold me here".  
"Oh I believe I can. Want me to prove it again?"  
"You realize that it can be seen as an abuse of power? Not exactly the kind of example you'd like to set for your pack I'm sure".  
"That's not your concern".  
"Well no, of course not, but you can't force someone into something they don't want. Trust me on this, if nothing else, pack life is most definitely not for me".  
"You will learn. Your punishment stands. Like it or not, you're one of us".

With a simple flick of her tail, Aleu sent the other wolves up the hill. All Rusty could bring himself to do was watch. Curiosity brought him nothing but trouble. But still, the wolf dingo found this strange hybrid queen fascinating. He'd take the punishment, for now, just to learn more about her…


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

_Change the colors of the sky and open up to the ways you made me feel alive, the ways I loved you. _

Rusty followed the pack to their resting place, their rendezvous, their den, which was really just series of large, spacious caves. Upon their arrival, a little white wolf puppy came out with her babysitter and tumbled into Aleu. She looked to be no older than perhaps six months, maybe younger, but she was still tiny. This pup caught Rusty's attention.

"I'm so happy you're back mama! I missed you!" she said with a soft attempt at a growl.

She had a pup?! She didn't have a mate…did she? At least according to what he smelled before, Rusty knew there wasn't an alpha male in this pack…but still…He watched the two carefully.

"I know little one. Let's get you fed, c'mon" Aleu and the pack entered the caverns, and Rusty attempted to follow.

But the last two wolves, his attackers before, snarled and snapped their jaws at him, anger ablaze in their eyes. That was perfectly fine with him. He'd always been the outcast (albeit a fairly high ranking one) but an outcast regardless. Rusty growled lowly in kind and made his "bed" under a nearby tree. He wasn't welcome here. Why should he hang around if he wasn't wanted? And really, did Aleu need a new wolf? What good was he to her anyway? He tried to figure out an answer, but it was frustrating and he let it go. Rusty allowed himself to drift off into sleep…

The darkness surrounded him, and he couldn't see. But he could hear. He heard shouting and the loud bangs of the human weapons. He felt himself being picked up by hurried, yet gentle fangs and heard the swinging of a wooden door, leaving the room even darker.

His rescuer snarled at the offending humans, letting out a warning bark. All he heard was a wicked, horrible laugh and then another loud bang, which was followed by a startled, painful yelp. That was the last he heard of his mother…

Rusty opened his eyes and found he was whimpering. His demons didn't bother him during the day, when he didn't think about them, but in the nocturnal place meant to be a haven, it was a hell for him. Memories of his time with his mother, no matter how brief, plagued him one moment, then were soothed by memories of little Madeline. Madeline had been his savior. Sure her father had pulled him out of that hellhole, but it was his little girl that saved what was left of his soul. Now if only she could find him now…

It was utterly useless now to think of her, to think of anyone from that life. He doubted any of them remembered him, though the alpha of this pack, she made him think of someone. Someone he'd only heard of but never actually seen. God, what had his name been again? The locals had called him Balto, but he'd never met the alleged wolf-dog. Rusty may have caught a few glimpses of him every once in a while, but hardly ever. The wolf-dingo usually stayed close to his own alpha, Madeline's father, Inspector Aubrey, and kept to himself when he wasn't around his humans.

A voice drew him away from his thoughts. "Are you okay?"

Rusty looked up and turned his head to see Aleu standing outside the mouth of the caverns, watching him intently. There was concern in her blue eyes, but he was quick to put it out.

"I'm fine" the wolf dingo rolled over, trying not to let her see, as if that would somehow make him invisible.  
"It's cold out tonight, even to me. Why don't you come inside?"  
Rusty rolled over and growled. "Look, will you just leave me alone, kid? And I don't care if you're an alpha or not, you have nothing, NOT A THING, on me. The only reason I'm here is because you humiliated me in front of your damn pack. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to get some sleep".  
Aleu looked a little upset at first and then angry. "I was only trying to be nice".  
"Well the world isn't exactly a nice place. Learn that while you're still young and get out of my face! When you've seen how cruel the world truly is, then you can come talk to me and even then…"

This conversation only increased Aleu's curiosity. What could've possibly happened to make this creature think the way he did? Why was the world so dark, so wrong to him? She noticed something with a slight shine around his neck, a possible clue perhaps as to who he once was?

"What is that?" she asked, "The thing around your neck".  
Rusty growled and once again turned his back to her. "Piss off" was all he said.

He heard walk back into the caverns and shuddered as a breeze blew over him. A storm was coming, but oh well. He'd make it through. He always did. He was a survivor. He would make it out of this hell and, with a slight hope, find his heaven once again.

Now he saw _her_. Madeline…his sweet, beloved Madeline. She was only seven when he'd been brought to her. He saw her beautiful blue eyes light up with happiness as she put him in the harness attached to the sled. He wasn't a racer, he knew, but for her, he'd do anything. The little human had him wrapped around her finger.

"One day you'll be a good racing doggy won't you?" she asked, petting his head.

All Rusty…no, he was Aubrey back then, could do was smile and wag his tail. He didn't care what she said. He'd do anything, be anything as long as she was smiling and happy. Aubrey gave her face a soft lick. He loved this human, more than his own life…

God if only that heaven had lasted! Aubrey awoke into Rusty once more and growled as he shook snow off of himself. The storm had hit while they were asleep. Speaking of which, they were all still asleep. Now could be his chance! He could run, get away from here! The snow wasn't too deep, and he could easily run through it! With new found determination, the wolf dingo looked at the caverns disdainfully and took off back in the direction that he'd come, hoping never to return. He could survive on his own, without them.


	5. Chapter 4

'**Chapter 4**

_Of all the things that never die, to make it through the night, love will find you. _

The snow was thicker than Rusty had imagined. The wolf dingo cursed to himself as he made his way through the deep snow, his paws and parts of his legs going numb. But it didn't matter. He needed to get out of here. He wasn't wanted, he wasn't needed. What was the point in staying?

Rusty had a higher calling. There was a family he needed to find. His family. Only with them could he be free of the demons that plagued him. Only one person was on his mind: Madeline. That sweet little girl, his redemption…she'd saved him once, she could do it again. She was always strong, strong in her innocence, strong in the love she had for him. That unconditional sweet love he now longed for more than anything in the world. The wolf dingo kept going…

Aleu woke to find the stranger missing. She cursed to herself, knowing she should've dragged him inside last night. He was going to get lost out here in this world of white. What the hell possessed him to go out in this kind of weather anyway?! Then she saw something glittering in the snow. Cautiously, the alpha went over to investigate.

It was copper or bronze in color, a chain. On the end of it, there was a key. A key to what she didn't know. She remembered last night, how he got defensive about the thing around his neck. This must've been it! He was protective of it…surely he'd come back for it…but what if he didn't know his way back? Aleu picked it up, determined to return it back to him herself…

Something was missing, he knew it…The chain! The key! Where was it?! There was no way he'd lost it! It was around his neck at all times! Rusty dug around in the snow frantically for it, as if his very life depended on it. And, at least in his mind, it did. It was all he had left of his precious human and with it his soul. Without it…he was nothing. He was nobody.

It was gone…and Rusty felt himself slipping away. He was once again that lost, scared puppy locked away in a dark cabinet crying for his mother. He was weak, defenseless again. A weakness overtook him and the wolf dingo collapsed in the snow, no longer caring if he lived or died. Nothing mattered anymore. He lost everything. His home, his family, his strength, his soul…

His heart was cold, frozen. What was he supposed to do now? He felt nothing, knew nothing. Never before had he wanted to give up so easily. Rusty closed his eyes.

"He's over here!" a voice called, but he didn't know whose it was. He didn't care either. Rusty shook either from cold or anticipation, he didn't know.  
"Is he alright?!" it was Aleu this time.  
"He's not hurt, but he looks to be in pretty bad shape".  
"We need to get him back to caverns. He'll die if he stays out here".  
Rusty snarled. "Leave…me…"  
"Are you crazy?!" Aleu exclaimed, "You'll die out here".  
"So…be…it".  
"God you are one stubborn fellow. Look, I need you to work with me. I have something that belongs to you" Aleu put the chain down in the snow next to Rusty's head, "Was it such a hard question to answer last night? You could've just told me it was a key".

Rusty saw it fall to the ground and it was like his strength almost immediately returned. He growled and grabbed the cold chain with his teeth.

"It's not your business" he told her coldly.  
"I'm not asking where you got it, or what it means to you. I just want to help. You need it, obviously".  
"And what's that supposed to mean?"  
"Come back to the caverns. I won't ask about the key or anything, all I'm asking is you trust us".

Rusty looked up at Aleu unsure now. Could he trust these wolves? They'd tried to kill him just the day before, but she, in a way, had saved him. Granted it would never be the same as Madeline had saved him, but just as well. Could he give up on her after two years of thinking of nothing but her? The wolf dingo whimpered with uncertainty.

"C'mon" Aleu said reassuringly, "I'll help you".  
Rusty shook his head. "No one can help me now…much less you".

The young alpha shook her head and rolled her eyes. With a light growl, she bit Rusty's neck again and started to drag him. She was surprised he didn't put up a fight. His whole face was in a blank stare and he looked defeated. Hopefully soon he'd get his fighting spirit back, and she'd do whatever it took to get him to trust her. Whatever his problem was, she had to solve it and help him put whatever it was behind him. Aleu would stop at nothing until this task was accomplished.

Another one of her wolves came and helped drag Rusty back to the caverns where, under her protection, the wolf dingo was finally welcome to enter.


	6. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

_What about now? What about today? What if you're making me all that I was meant to be? _

Rusty woke to something warm and small curled up next to him. Opening a single brown eye, still groggy from sleep (or unconsciousness he didn't know), he spotted the little white pup from the previous day. She was sleeping peacefully right next to him, her breathing calm and sweet in a way he couldn't describe. He remembered when Madeline would fall asleep next to him like that. She'd been so tiny, so weak, and yet so alive when she woke and smiled at him. He woke every morning for that smile, often times waking her himself just to see it, and hear her laughter. It was his own personal addiction that, at least back then, he couldn't live without.

He stayed just as still as he did when she was there. It almost felt like she was, but it was only a dream. He was stuck back in his own personal hell once more. Stuck with a group, a pack, depending on others for survival. Now only god knew what was going to happen to him, if they'd turn on him or anything. He didn't trust anyone, but this pup, there was nothing she couldn't do to him. And, to be honest, there was nothing he could do to her.

He didn't want to do anything, he realized. She was just a puppy for goodness sake. How could the thought of hurting her come to mind? What did he have to fear of her? Had his heart turned to so cold that he'd go as far as to hurting an innocent soul whom, in another life, he would've risked all to protect? It had been his job then, to protect the innocent and punish the guilty. Well, how ironic was it now that he'd fallen into the same guilty pit as those he had taken down himself or helped take down? The wolf dingo however managed to keep his peace despite these thoughts.

Would she be angry if he woke her? He wanted to, to figure why the hell he was here once again, but at the same time he didn't want to risk upsetting her or anything. He didn't even know her name. Rusty stayed quiet and still as can be. The little white puppy slept on. Rusty never took his eyes off of her.

The click of nails against stone caught his attention. He looked to the entrance of the caverns, alert as ever, only to see Aleu there carrying a caribou tendon in her mouth. She smiled and gazed her little one softly.

"What?" he asked, misunderstanding her smile. Or was he?  
"She already likes you. Hasn't spoken a word to you and she already likes you".  
"Yeah well…she'll find reasons to hate me".  
"I don't think so" Aleu disagreed, dropping the tendon at his feet, "I haven't yet".  
"There's a shocker".  
"You don't believe me?"  
"I killed one of your wolves. You should be casting me out instead of keeping me here where I don't belong".  
"And this is your way of repaying for your deed. You killed Zarin, so now you're replacing him here in the pack".  
"Who was he to you?"  
"He was one of pack's lead hunters. I take it you're pretty good at taking down prey".  
"Depends. I've been living off small animals most of my time alone. I've hunted caribou only a few times".  
"Well you'll learn then".  
"Prepare for a challenge then. Old habits die hard".  
"Old habits?"  
"Well more like instinct. My kind only run in packs if they absolutely need to. Mother never had to…at least not to my memory she never did".  
"What was she like?" Aleu asked softly, trying not to seem like she was prying.  
"What does it matter to you?"  
"Just trying to learn more about you. Being friendly is all".  
"I don't have friends, young one. Never had need of them".  
"Do you always act like this?"  
"Like what?"  
"Like a dick, if I may be so bold".  
"I've been called worse and to answer your question, yes".  
"Why? You're not gonna get anywhere acting like that".  
"I actually got pretty far if I dare so myself. I've made it on my own for the past two years this way".  
"Bet it gets lonely after a while".  
Rusty rolled his eyes. "No not really. You learn that sometimes it's a lot better to be alone. Especially when you know all you're going to do is lose the people you care for in the end".  
"That's not true! And you shouldn't say things like that!"  
Rusty snarled. "Who the hell are you to tell me that it isn't true?! Hm?! When you lose everything that you love then you can tell me that it's not true!"

The wolf dingo kicked away the tendon, refusing to eat anything the alpha brought to him. He didn't want her help, her sympathy, nothing. He turned to walk away just as the pup stirred against him. Aleu gave him only a soft, sympathetic look.

"Is that what happened to you?" she asked, "You lost everything you cared about?"  
"That is none of your concern" he growled.  
"But is it true?" the little pup raised her head.  
"Aniu, sweetie, go back to sleep" Aleu nudged and licked the pup.  
"But mama, I wanna know more about him. Please…is it true?" she asked with pleading yellow eyes.  
"I have lost much" he answered, "But not everything. Not yet at least".  
"So then be happy. You still have something left, whatever it might be".  
"You don't understand child. And I'm not about to share my life story with you or anyone else. Forgive me" he turned away from the two and went to walk away.  
"Wait!" the puppy, Aniu, slipped a little on her way toward him, "You still have us! We won't leave you! Did someone hurt you? We won't hurt you! I promise! Please don't leave!"  
"None of those questions matter to you. I am nothing but a stranger, child. Let me go".

Why did she look at him like that? Her eyes were round and soft, trusting. He knew that look. It was a plea, a child's plea, and something he always found hard to resist. But that was in another life, another time. He was a different creature now. Rusty wouldn't let himself be weak again. He growled and made his way past her, almost kicking her in the process, but she scuttled away.

Then something happened. As he walked away, Rusty heard Aleu's growls, but also Aniu's little whimpers. It causes Rusty to stop mid step, turn, and look at her. The puppy was letting out little cries that made him think of human sobs. He remembered when Madeline used to cry. And there she was…right in front of him in Aniu's place.

"All we wanted to do was help…we just wanted to be friends" she said.  
"I…I'm sorry" he replied, his voice trailing off just a little, his heart aching.  
"Don't go" she pleaded.  
"I…I never wanted to. Oh Madeline…my sweet Maddie! I'm so, so, so sorry!" he hurried back to Aniu's side, and started to lick her all over, affectionately, trying to take away any pain he may have caused.

The puppy didn't seem to notice or care that this stranger had called her by a different name, just that he was comforting her. But Aleu looked on in confusion. He'd just called her Madeline. Who was that? Did she have something to do with the key around his neck? And what made this girl so precious to him that he'd actually seen her in her daughter? Aleu felt a new dose of pity for this creature. This Madeline girl, he'd obviously loved her so.

"Who is she?" Aleu thought as she watched Rusty lay down and cuddle the puppy close to him, licking her head comfortingly, and giving her soft, sweet whines.

Rusty couldn't stop crying. He never wanted to leave Madeline, but he'd had no choice. The protection of her father was what had counted at that moment. He never would've abandoned her had he another choice, another chance. He couldn't change the past, Rusty knew, but he had to change the future before it was too late for himself or anyone else.


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

_What if our love never went away? _

The process was going remarkably slow. Rusty still wasn't used to living in a pack. He wasn't too amiable of the other pack members, who still called him things like baby killer and finding new ways to mock his accent supposedly behind his back. The wolf dingo tried his hardest to not listen, but he'd heard insults like that all the time back when he was on the force. Yeah, they couldn't get away with it then, but now he was nearly powerless to stop it, at least not without severe consequences should he harm one of Aleu's wolves again.

He wasn't afraid of her, make no mistake of that. But ever since taking time to somewhat bond with Aniu, he had a certain respect for the Alpha. He'd always had respect for authority back when he was with Inspector Aubrey and Madeline, and that instinct was starting to come back to him in bits and pieces. It was merely this respect that restrained her from killing every last one of the wolves that insulted him. Aleu, of course, didn't know about it, and he wasn't about to tell her either. If worse came to worst, Rusty could fight his own battles. It was his problem, and he wasn't going to risk anyone else to correct it. Overall, he found pack life irritating at worst, but revitalizing at best.

Speaking of the Alpha, she kept an eye on the mysterious newcomer. The question of the key never left her mind. Why was it so precious to him? What sort of secrets did he keep? Who was this Madeline he often mumbled about in his troubled sleep? He was just so strange, so mysterious in his ways. He seemed to have a troubled personality too, something that humans may have called bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, or even multiple personality disorder. With little Aniu, Rusty was often protective and paternal, but with everyone else he was uptight, always on his guard, and quick to jump to conclusions. It made him unstable and she knew it. Perhaps it was the dingo side of him that made him that way, for she knew it wasn't typical wolf hybrid behavior. Had something happened to make him this way? Aleu wondered what it could possibly be.

She watched him with Aniu, and oddly enough, was charmed by his oddly sweet temper toward the pup. He played with her, tolerating her quips and when she used him sometimes as a chew toy. Never since that first time, a few months ago, did he ever raise a claw or fang to her. At the same time, she was also picking up some slight things from him. Often times, Aleu would see the two together, she acted nearly identical to him, mimicking his strange, long stride, and tried, quite hilariously, to mimic his accent. It even made the wolf dingo laugh at times, which Aleu found she actually liked that sound. It was the only happy sound he made.

But she knew deep down he wasn't happy. She wanted to know why, but didn't dare ask, seeing as how he'd put her down faster than anything. Not that Aleu was afraid of him either, but if he didn't feel like talking, she wasn't going to make him. Sometimes, she learned, the best way to learn about someone new was keeping your silence and letting the other speak first.

Rusty kept his silence. What really was there to say? What could he tell them that they'd believe? What? That he'd been orphaned as a pup, taken in by a policeman and his daughter, and later helped to hunt down humans like the ones who'd brutally murdered his parents? These wolves knew nothing of anything like that. The only remotely close to an authority figure they had was Aleu, and the other alpha, whose name Rusty learned was Nava, before her.

The subject of Nava fascinated the wolf dingo. He'd been a great and wise leader, with mysterious powers to match. While Rusty didn't believe the latter part, he still found this Nava character interesting. He'd been in communication with all around him, understood that every life had value. Deep down, Rusty wondered what Nava would've made of him. It didn't hurt to wonder, but he kept his wonderings about the old wolf to himself. Maybe someday, when he felt he could trust her more, he'd ask Aleu.

Dawn broke another day but it wasn't just another day to Rusty. The dawn brought a special day to him, and to those he loved. It was Madeline's birthday. He remembered even after all this time. The snow had begun to melt, and the first flowers of spring started to bloom, surviving through the permafrost in the ground. She was all he could think of today. How old was she now? She was seven when he had last seen her, and it was two years since then. She was nine now.

The wolf dingo made his way from under his tree over to a nearby river, which was starting to melt from its icy state. He took a drink, and then a moment to contemplate on further matters. Looking at his reflection, Rusty didn't look like his former self, Aubrey, at all. Aubrey had been well taken care of, perfectly groomed with a shiny red brown coat that was free of tangles and gnarls. He'd been loved by his humans, respected by his superiors, feared by those who dared to break the law he so valiantly fought for. But now he looked around. He'd fallen so far…too far for his own comfort. Again, he wondered if Madeline would even recognize him. Hell, did she even remember him?

He remembered her. How could he forget? There was no such thing as happiness or unhappiness in the eyes of Rusty. The life of a happy thing was a beautiful field of roses with only few thorny dead ones. The life of an unhappy being was a thorny field with a few beautiful roses here and there. No doubt that the child had been his bright red rose in his field of dead brown and deathly green. He couldn't, wouldn't give up on her now. He'd endure this, he'd find her, somehow or other. He'd once again be Aubrey, just and good. He'd fight for her, fight to protect the innocent, and vanquish those who caused her or anyone else harm. He'd die for it all given the chance, just to be Aubrey again…for just a moment.

"Rusty?" Aleu's voice again, pulled him from his thoughts.

The wolf dingo turned and gave her a curt nod in greeting. He didn't say anything.

"You okay?" she asked.  
"I'm well thank you for asking. And yourself?"  
"I'm fine, thanks. Just Aniu woke up and saw you were missing. I told her I'd try to find you".  
"I told her I wasn't going to leave. I don't break my vows, Miss Aleu".  
"Just Aleu, none of that miss stuff".  
"My apologies, Mi-Aleu" he caught himself.  
"So…What's with the manners? You act an awful lot like…like a human".  
Rusty sighed. "I was raised by humans, and yes, I have picked up some of their mannerisms".  
"Knew it" Aleu thought, "So you had a family, a human family".  
"A small one, but yes. Years ago".  
"What were they like?" Aleu asked, fascinated now more than ever.

The wolf dingo didn't understand why he felt like talking all of a sudden. Maybe he was finally feeling as if he could trust this alpha. He took a deep breath.

"They were good people. A man and his young daughter. Inspector Aubrey and his daughter…Madeline".  
"So that's who Madeline was. She was your girl".  
"She was more than that. The girl was my everything. She was my salvation, my hope, my love, all that I had, it was her. When you love something or someone so much, that you would lay down your life for them…it's a major thing. You would do anything, be anything for that person, just out of love. How strange it is now that I think about it. Love is such a strange thing".

Aleu kept listening as he went on. Obviously, he knew much and she was more than willing to listen.

"How quickly it can come to you, and it seems the harder you hold on to it, the easier it is for it to slip away. It's like a flame, Aleu. Once it's gone…it's gone forever".  
"That's not true. Maybe you can find them again".  
"I've tried. For two years, I've searched".  
"Well you can't give up, Rusty. I mean if you loved them so much, why did you stop?"  
"To be honest, I never have stopped. But it seems the more I look, the further they slip away. Aleu, I'm sorry but you don't know what that's like. A love like what I had for Madeline, and for what I did with my life back then…I can't even find the words to describe it. It was everything to me".  
"What'd you do?"  
"I worked with the police. Inspector Aubrey trained me himself".  
"You're kidding me?! You're a cop dog?!"  
"Formerly, but yes. I worked with the police to help track down all kinds of criminals. Hell, I was the best dog on the force, according to what they said. No one, animal or man, could escape from me. Again, how funny it is. I can track a criminal on a cloudy day but yet…I can't find the ones I love".  
"You'll find them. If you give me a chance, I'll try to help. Where are you from?"  
"I was born on a whole other continent".  
"Not what I meant. I mean around here, in Alaska".  
"The good Inspector was stationed in a small town a few days out from here I believe. It was called Nome".  
"Wait, you're from Nome?!"  
"Yes what of it?"  
"My…my family lives there! I can take you back! If anyone can help you, they can!" Aleu smiled widely and wagged her tail.  
Rusty looked suspicious. "You would do that, for me?"  
"Of course! I know how important they were to you, and who am I to keep you from them? I'll help in any way I can".  
"A-Aleu…I…I don't know what to say. I'll never be able to repay you".  
"No repayment needed, Rusty. I'll lead you there myself".  
"What about Aniu and the pack?"  
"Aniu will come with us. I'll only be gone for a short time, they can handle themselves 'til I get back I'm sure".  
"Thank you, Miss Aleu" Rusty bowed his head in respect of this alpha, this wonderful creature who hopefully would reunite him with all he loved.


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find? Baby before it's too late…what about now? _

The idea was wonderful to Aniu. She didn't want to be separated from her mother or the wolf dingo she was starting to consider her family as well. And now at least she was helping instead of hindering. Rusty was somewhat against the idea, as he didn't want the pup to get hurt. But he made a vow to himself to never let danger come to either of them.

Aleu was delighted herself. She was glad to finally be going home, seeing her family again. What she couldn't believe was that Rusty was from Nome. Not only that he was cop! A cop dog! She wondered if he knew her father…or anyone else from the town. Aleu never recalled seeing him either when she lived there for a short time. Or maybe she did, and just hadn't recognized him.

Her family, at least half of it, wasn't in so well with the police. Even after saving the children of Nome, some officers still didn't trust her father. That same mistrust was fallen on her. As much as she tried, and in some ways succeeded, they still had their suspicions. Aleu avoided the authorities at all costs, not because she ever broke a law or anything, but to ease their minds. She wondered though what Rusty would've thought of her if he'd ever seen her when he was an officer. She made a mental note to ask him about it later.

One thing honestly concerned her about the journey. To get to their new home, Aleu had to lead the pack across the Great Water. They had managed thankfully because of ice rafts. They wouldn't be so lucky this time, as it was spring and the ice, for the most part, was melted. How were they to cross? Sure, she and Rusty would be able to make the swim, but Aniu…she was too little, she'd never make it.

"We might not get to take Aniu" Aleu found him left to his own musings that night.  
"And why's that?" the wolf dingo asked.  
"We're gonna have to cross water…and many other dangers. Heck, a raven led me to the pack's old territory, and I had to lead them here on the ice bridge. We don't have that now, not in this season. I mean you and I could probably make the swim, if we're lucky, but Aniu…"  
Rusty nodded. "I see what you mean. One of us could carry her. In fact, I'll do it myself".  
"Rusty-"  
"I insist, Aleu. Her safety, as well as your own, is at the top of my priority list right now. I've had to carry heavier things out of frozen lakes many times before".

Rusty was surprised when he felt Aleu's head on his shoulder. As uncomfortable as he found it, he didn't have it in him to pull away. He stared down at her head with a quiet sort of wonder. What was she thinking?

"I'll bet you were a wonderful officer" she said.  
"I was one of the best on the force, according to my superiors".  
"Did you ever track down other dogs?"  
"Only those we thought were a danger to the town. Often times, yes, I drove wolves away from the town's borders".  
"Did you ever kill anyone?"  
"No…never. An officer's job isn't to kill, Aleu. It is to protect. Not just the law or the innocent, but the accused as well".  
"Why?"  
"Because not all accused turn out to be guilty. We work to the protection of all".  
"Sounds like it'd be hard. I mean, especially if you held a grudge against someone".  
"I never truly knew anyone. So really, there was no one to hold a grudge against. Though there was someone…but I won't go into that".  
"And I won't pry. But at least answer me this: Did you ever see me or my family at all?"  
"Depends, I need names and descriptions".  
"Well I look mostly like my papa, Balto. My mom's name is Jenna, she was a red and white husky, belonged to a little girl named Rosie".  
"I knew it! Yes, I've heard of your father and if I recall correctly, I did meet your mother briefly while on a case one night…it was years ago though, when I was first starting out in Nome".  
"Wait, you were tracking my mom?!"  
"No! Oh no, no, never. I was working on my own that night, the good Inspector was on patrol and I decided to do one on my own. She ran into some trouble with some cowardly blokes and I broke it up before anything else could happen, then escorted her home to keep them away. Her family offered me a short meal, which I found myself declining. I never accepted rewards for my work. Just never felt right".

This creature, this wolf, this dingo, she didn't know what to call him anymore, he'd possibly saved her mother. It was, at least in part, thanks to him she was even around. Aleu, without really thinking, licked Rusty's cheek in gratitude. The wolf dingo went wide eyed, growled slightly and jumped away as if something had burned him. He stood across from her, stiff legged, head down and ears back against his head.

"Oh" Aleu looked ashamed and for a moment scared, "I'm sorry. I…I didn't mean to offend, Rusty. I was just showing gratitude is all. I mean, I don't think it's right you didn't take rewards. So I figured I at least owed you something, and I don't really have much anyway-"  
"Don't…do that" he said with gritted teeth, but not a growl.  
"Why?"  
"Just…just don't do it" the wolf dingo sighed and turned away from her, "Affection, in any form, isn't exactly my forte".  
"You're affectionate with Aniu".  
"That's different!" he faced her sharply, as if she'd accused him of something, "A child's affection is…different. It's unconditional. Unprejudiced. It's purely blind. It's something to be cherished, for as long as they're blind to any truth, their love remains as it is, unconditional".  
"Let me guess…Madeline has something to do with that philosophy?"  
"Don't drag her into this!" Rusty growled now, more angry than surprised and reverent, "I know she'd love me no matter my circumstances!".  
"Ah…I see what it is. You have the same problem papa and I did. You don't know who you are, where you belong. The only thing you've ever known is your human family".  
"Enough" his growl started to deepen.  
"You loved them, didn't you?" she knew she was pushing it, but for once she wanted to see him cracked, at his most vulnerable.

There were chips in the stone walls around his heart. Why he'd built them she couldn't possibly figure out. How could a heart once so full of love and pride suddenly grow cold and hidden? Had Madeline's love been torn from him? Against her better judgment, Aleu pressed further.

"Shut up" Rusty snarled now.  
"You loved Madeline didn't you? You saw her like your own. You failed her! You ran from her!"  
"I DID NO SUCH THING! I never would've abandoned her! I did what I did to protect her father! It wasn't my fault! I did love her, I still do. When I see Aniu, I see my girl. That sweet little girl who convinced her father to take me in, to give me a home when I deserved no such thing. I'm a half breed, a lowlife bastard who knows of no and has no other place except with the one he loves most. But you don't know what that's like, do you? Humans never fully accepted you either? It hurts to be judged based on your bloodline isn't it?"

Now he was fighting back. As much as it got under Aleu's skin, she knew he was right. He was good at this. Well this shouldn't have been surprise, he was a cop dog after all. He'd probably seen all kinds of canines and other animals like himself or her, who tried to use his heritage against him. But in that one burst of righteous anger she'd seen it. The crack in the wall got bigger. She needed to pry more if she was going to learn more.

"But I at least, don't let it ultimately define who I am. I don't try to fit in, never truly did. You on the other hand, if it came down to pretending in order to belong or being who you are, you'd rather pretend, wouldn't you?".  
"What is it you're trying to prove here, Aleu? You know nothing of me, wolf dog. See I can't pretend unlike you. There's only wolves here and as I don't even remotely resemble a wolf, where can I go? The only thing that reveals my wolf heritage is my nature itself, and I can't and won't apologize for being who and what I am. Not to you, not to anybody. I have never had a need or want to prove myself to anyone except my superiors and my family. Let others think of me as they will, as I shall not listen to them or anything they have to say, as one particular dog learned…almost with his life".  
"So you did kill someone?"  
"No, wanted to, but didn't. After the stunt he pulled, after all he did, he would've deserved it but it wouldn't have done anything to fix the problem, and it only would've made me a criminal, worse even than him. I would've been damning myself and failing the human I loved" Rusty sighed at this confession, "which I currently am doing by disrespecting your authority" he bowed his head respectfully, his anger vanishing, "Forgive me, Miss Aleu. Good night, and I shall see you and possibly Aniu tomorrow morning. We'll find a way to Nome, somehow or other, and if you do not wish to guide me after this incident, I will be more than glad to try to find my own way".

With this strange formality, the wolf dingo walked away from Aleu, perfectly calm and concentrated. He'd lost his temper only once and even after that still maintained near perfect composure. Sure he'd growled and snarled, but never once did he make a move to attack. It amazed Aleu beyond belief. Had she confronted him about this before he probably would've attacked her. It was a good sign. She was finally getting somewhere with him. Soon, the walls would come down and she'd know who this stranger really was on the inside.


	9. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_Sun is breaking in your eyes, to start a new day. _

It was dark when the trio woke. Aleu left the pack under the command of her beta, and with that secure, the three took off. For Aniu, it was exciting, but the sudden quiet of her mother and Rusty was slightly disturbing. Well, they weren't normally chatty, but they hardly passed a word between each other. Had something happened last night she didn't know of? Was something wrong? And most importantly, was it something she did?

Rusty felt cold. Everywhere. Just cold. His face, his paws, his heart. Everything was cold. He kept a blind eye to Aniu, who mostly kept close to her mother anyway. It didn't matter. All he needed was for her to guide him home. Once he was back, the cold would go away. He'd be home, where he was safe and wanted. He wouldn't have to worry about all this anymore.

Aleu knew he was cold. He certainly looked it. His face and body were stiff as he moved, having absolutely none of the fluidity he'd had recently. His brown eyes appeared to only have ice in them. Had last night's confrontation left him this way? If so, the young alpha found herself regretting wanting to learn more. He wasn't even speaking to Aniu, and that was cause enough for concern, as supposedly he'd grown to love the pup like his own.

Finally, Aniu let out a soft whimper, trying to get his attention. The wolf dingo remained like stone. He didn't dare face her, or even address she was there. He kept looking ahead, watching Aleu as she led the way. The pup then tried one last option. She nipped his tail with her teeth. He couldn't have turned faster if he'd been hit.

Rusty snarled. When he was like this, he didn't like being bothered. Surely the girl knew this? Rusty snapped his jaw at the girl, not to hurt her, but to send a message. He didn't want to be bothered. But god, the girl was so much like her mother!

"Rusty…what's wrong?" she asked innocently.  
"Leave me alone, kid".  
"Rusty…you can tell me".  
"Just let it go, kid. I don't wanna hurt you".  
"You wouldn't hurt me…would you?"

Would he? Given the chance, could he bring himself to hurt an innocent soul whose only crime was trying to see if he was okay? Would he hurt someone just for caring, and caring about him above all else? While for a second the wolf dingo relished the thought, it made him sick. If he hurt an innocent, he was no better than the criminals he helped to hunt down, worse even than the dog who had constantly pursued Aleu's mother…the one thorn in his side he'd wanted dead since he laid eyes on him.

Damned if he turned out like that godforsaken coward!

Rusty shook his head. "No little one. Never would I hurt you and I'm sorry. It's just been a long day already and I'm tired as can be. I have a lot on my mind".

This didn't escape Aleu, who kept an ear on the conversation. If she couldn't get Rusty to open up, maybe Aniu could. She figured this was due to his relationship with Madeline, that he was closer to children. And on top of that, what he'd revealed to her last night, about what he felt was unconditional love that children had. Which led her to one conclusion: Rusty was afraid.

There was a darkness now inside him that he couldn't get away from. He believed his own heart dead, but the way Aleu saw it, it was very much alive. But it didn't feel. Well, at least it didn't feel all the time, like it did once. He was just too afraid to show it, perhaps because of that darkness. It made Aleu sad just thinking about it. Deep down, her own heart broke for him.

But soon hopefully it'd be alright. He'd be reunited with his family and he wouldn't need them anymore. Aleu wondered if maybe this was the right thing. It seemed he truly did have the same problem as she and her father before her once had. He was denying one part of himself, giving way over to the other. She didn't know much about dingoes, but she was sure he was displaying far more dingo like behavior than wolf. It was like he was holding it back. But why? What was the point? It didn't change the facts.

Maybe it changed how he thought about himself though. Humans weren't too trusting of wolves. Rusty had only ever known the presence and love of humans, never of his own kind, or at least that she knew of. Aleu wanted to know his story, but who was she to demand it of him? She resolved to keep her silence. If he wanted to tell her, someday he would. She just wished it was sooner than later.


	10. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

_This broken heart can still survive with a touch of your grace. _

They'd traveled all day, and they were close to the great water. Rusty could smell it. It was just one step closer to home, back to Madeline and the good Inspector. Soon, he'd leave this, this perception of himself behind and once again become Aubrey. Good, righteous, Madeline's Aubrey. For the first time in two years, Rusty's tail wagged with delight.

All the years of wondering and waiting was finally paying off. And to think, all he had to do was find a pack. Who knew going against instinct could pay off so well? How lucky was he? But another thought was tugging at the wolf dingo's heart like Aniu tugging at his tail.

What would happen to Aleu and Aniu once he was back in Nome? Could he abandon Aniu, no matter the cost? Could he truly do it? Would she hate him for it? Of course not! Surely she understood, right?

Deep down he knew the answer was no. When it came right down to it, there was no way she really could understand. For a moment, Rusty felt ashamed of himself. How could he possibly expect her, a young pup, to understand his situation? She knew little of the ways of man, and most likely wouldn't learn until she was older. All she would understand was that he was leaving her. After all that happened, after all the times they shared, he would leave her and let her down, just like he did Madeline…

She'd been one of the first victims of the typhoid outbreak. She was so weak the last time he saw her, still in her sickbed. The Inspector was desperate to save his daughter, and that desperation got worse when it was discovered the sled dog team sent to retrieve the medicine was lost. He hadn't been the only one who heard about it. His sick little girl did too.

Aubrey put his head on his paws, which rested on the girl's bed. She was pale, looking worse than usual. The wolf dingo knew there was nothing he could do except offer her comfort. He never wanted to leave her side. He let out a soft whine and licked her face. Madeline opened her little gray eyes and smiled at her beloved friend and guardian.

"Hey buddy" she reached a little hand out and pet his head, between his ears, "You gotta find 'em" she coughed, "You and papa have to find the team….please, for me…for everyone. I know you can do it…I believe in you Aubrey".

Aubrey let out a soft whine and replied, though she didn't understand: "Oh I promise…You're going to live little one. I promise" he licked her face again to reassure her…

But he'd failed, Rusty remembered. He'd failed her. Balto had found the team, not him. And god only knew if he had gotten the medicine to his beloved human in time. What had he done? Well, he saved her father's life from a bear attack, but at great cost…

"Aniu's asleep" Aleu's voice sounded and pulled him out of his thoughts.  
"I figured as much. Are you going to try to pry into me again?" he asked.  
"Not tonight. I think I battered you enough".  
"That you did".  
"Sorry".  
"I've been through worse. But that's one of the best things about being an inspector's dog. You learn a couple things about intimidation and its use as a weapon. You were only doing what you thought was right and so I blame you for nothing".  
"Rusty…c'mon, you gotta give me some answers here. I can't help you if you don't tell me anything about you. I know I wanna keep the peace here, and I've been silent long enough, waiting for you to tell me more about yourself. I don't wanna pry but…but I wanna know what you're all about".  
"The details of my life are currently inconsequential, especially to someone like you, as there really isn't much to tell".  
"I think there is. You just don't wanna say for fear of judgment".  
"I fear no judgment, as it isn't within your rights to judge me. I'll make you a deal, how's that?".  
"What kind of deal?"  
"Get me to Nome, and once we get there, I'll tell you everything you wanna know".  
"Can you at least tell me some things now?"  
"Two questions. That's it".

Aleu knew she had to pick them wisely. Rusty was perceptive, she knew, and chances are, given the chance, he'd dodge the question or come up with one to fire back at her. She had many questions, but which to ask first? She sighed and finally asked:

"How did you get separated from them? Your humans I mean".  
"Bear fight. We were out doing an investigation and a bear attacked him. I fought the bear off and distracted it while Inspector Aubrey went to go find help. Broke my back in the process".  
"Ouch".  
"Doesn't even begin to describe it. I was unconscious for some time, when I woke I was in some kind of large den, and there was a wolf there. Never before or since then had I met one as generous as her".

This caught Aleu's interest. He'd been nursed back to health by a wolf? His story just kept getting more and more intriguing to her. Still…she had just one other question and then he'd answer no more until Nome.

"Back in Nome, were you ever interested in like…I don't know…getting a mate and starting a family?"  
"No" Rusty sighed, "Never was interested, never had time. Crime didn't rest and neither did I. A mate and pups would've held me back from my duty".  
"But…but surely there was something else you wanted from life, not just your job or your human family".  
"I had all I could want. I had the love of my girl and the respect of my superiors. That was all I could afford to want at that time. I took what I could get, no matter how little. It still satisfied me".  
"You poor dog…" Aleu sighed, "You say there's things I don't understand. But there's a hell of a lot more things that you're not aware of that I am".  
"Like what?".  
"Like how to love. I mean, you loved once but now, it's like…like you're frozen inside. I've been trying to figure out why all this time. I mean I know your separation from Madeline has something to do with it, but there has to be something else. Something else you never knew and now I think I know what that is".  
"Oh?"  
"Despite it all, you were still lonely. You never let yourself get close to any of the dogs in Nome, I'll bet not even your fellow police dogs".  
"No. They weren't exactly the most accepting type".  
"So you were isolated even before you met us? You only ever grew attached to humans and so…that's why you didn't fit in. You took on their mannerisms. You didn't wanna be canine at all. You wanted to be human!".  
"There were days I wished I was. But it wasn't that way all the time. To be honest, I loved Madeline, and her love was all I ever needed. She saved me when all else failed. Sure her father rescued me from my previous life, but it was her, it was Madeline who put me back together and made me stronger than before. I became a police dog to keep her and others like her safe".  
"Like I said, you were probably a wonderful police dog. You're strong, dedicated, a good…well, dare I say it, but you're a good man. And I personally think anyone would be lucky to have someone like you".  
"I hate flattery. It's just another way to lie".  
"I'm not lying. I mean hell, one of these days I'd like to have a mate like you, someone who can lead the pack with strength but fairly too".  
"What kind of leader would you really like?" he asked out of curiosity.

To be honest, Rusty wasn't liking where this conversation was going. But things were slipping from both their minds, things that were on both their hearts for some time now. Rusty never did anything half way, especially not matters of the heart. He'd learned the hard way not to do anything half way.

"Strict, but fair and kind hearted" she answered.  
"Nothing like me".  
"I beg to differ".  
"How so?"  
"Well you're strict about what you do, and like I said you're dedicated. Even now you're showing some of your old police training I think. Fair because you look out for everyone, including the accused. And kind hearted because never once have you raised a paw or fang to me or my daughter. She needs a father like that".  
"Is that an invitation?"  
Aleu's eyes widened at the wolf dingo's sudden boldness. "Only if you're accepting".

Where the heck did that come from?! The only thing that surprised her more than his boldness was now hers. Looking at the situation right though, he was a good man. A man of authority, but knew when it was right to be calm and gentle, even playful. It was just so sad he didn't what she did.

Rusty sighed. "She deserves better than me. She deserves a full blood wolf, not some half breed dingo bastard…at least that's what I was called by…a certain someone".  
"Who?"  
"Don't worry about it. He's probably dead in a ditch somewhere".  
"Oh…well still, you think bloodlines are all that matter. It's not what matters. Aniu loves you".  
"Yes she does, but do you?"

Did she? Aleu wasn't sure what she felt about him. Sure he was good, but there was so much baggage, so much darkness in him she wasn't sure if she could handle it all. Not to mention he was going back to his family. Who was she to keep him away? Sure she could go with him, but that would mean to abandon her pack, which was something she wasn't bound to do now or ever. Again, who was she to keep him away from all that he loved? He was so free, but yet so entrapped.

"I'm willing to make a compromise for her. I'd give up all I had to make her happy, including having a mate who just wants to take care of her".  
"You'd make yourself miserable for her?"  
"Yes" Aleu nodded.  
"That is both a virtue and a folly. I'll have you know, I'd never make you miserable. A compromise would be out of the question. If you want me there for Aniu, you both would have to stay with me or I'd have to go with you. And I'm not leaving my family anytime soon".  
"I know. I won't make you. I'm just saying that if the circumstances were…different".  
"Can I ask you a question, Miss Aleu?"  
"Yes you may…Officer Rusty".  
"If the circumstances were indeed different, if I was different, could you have loved me?"

It was a question Aleu dreaded. He looked hopeful, yet was so good at keeping that hope hidden…what could she say? How could she say it and make it the truth? Or was it the truth already? A part of her felt some strange attachment to the wolf dingo already, so if she answered yes it wouldn't entirely be untrue, as a part of her cared for him now.

She took a deep breath. "Yes".  
"Thank you" was all he said.  
"For what?"  
"At least caring. Now, go back to Aniu. She might wake up and need you. I'll see you both in the morning. Good night, Miss Aleu" he bowed his head respectfully as she turned and went back to the makeshift burrow he'd made not too long ago.

He looked up at the dark sky and wondered if indeed his circumstances were different, could he bring himself to love Aleu? She wasn't bad at all, and she was a strong leader. She didn't need him for strength, but it was nice to be wanted. All his life he'd been needed, more times needed than wanted. Only Madeline and Inspector Aubrey ever truly wanted him. Why go back to a world where he wasn't welcome? None of this really seemed to make sense to him anymore. Rusty wanted to go back to his beloved humans to prove his love and loyalty, but at the same time he wanted to stay with Aleu and at least help her to raise Aniu. Torn in two ways…there was no way he could fix one without compromising the other.

"What can I do? I won't abandon Maddie again…but I can't hurt Aniu either. What if there comes a time when they both need me?! God, I can't let either one of them down!"

He feared this would happen sometime soon. It was better now than later down the road, he guessed. But still, he didn't want to break either heart, which would end in the inevitable break of his own.

"Oh wait" he thought, "It was never whole to begin with".


	11. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

_Shadows fade into the light. _

Rusty woke to the sound of light whimpers, and a small voice saying his name. At first he couldn't recognize it, as part of his mind was still clouded into the world of sleep. But slowly he came back to himself and felt a pair of little paws pushing against his side, softly, hesitantly. The wolf dingo opened a single brown eye to see Aniu looking wide eyed and afraid.

"Aniu…what are you doing up right now?" he asked, shaking his head, and sleep, away.  
"I…I had a bad dream, Rusty. I didn't wanna wake mama, so I came out here to you".  
"You'll catch your death out here little one, go back with your mother".  
"No! No, no, no, no! You'll leave again".  
"What are you…oh" he remembered.  
"You left us once before, back when you first met us. My nightmare…you left again and you never came back. You were gone forever! I…I tried to go after you but…but it was like you didn't even want to see me! Like…Like you hated me!".

The little white pup sobbed against his belly, and something new stirred inside Rusty. Here was a little one, scared of a nightmare, and of a possibility. True, he was going to leave them, but that didn't mean he hated them. He couldn't hate them, especially not her! This little pup had opened his heart to love, and for that he was forever in her debt.

"Hey…c'mon, none of that. Aniu look at me" she looked up at the sound of his voice so she was looking in his eyes, "Know this, I could never hate you. You or your mother. I may leave you, but that doesn't mean that I hate you. It just means…It just means my loyalties lie elsewhere. I have a home and a family that needs me".  
"I need you" Aniu replied through her tears.

Rusty's ears drooped to the side of his head. What did one say in a situation like this? Here he was, torn apart himself, unable to reassure someone who'd grown so dear to him that he didn't hate her. He didn't, and he knew the truth. He'd tried, and it didn't work. What could he say that wouldn't hurt her, break her little heart more?

"Shhh" he picked her up a little and set her between his outstretched front legs, close to his chest so she was warm, and so that hopefully his heartbeat would be her lullaby, "No sweetheart, you don't need me. You just want me".  
"What's the difference?" she cuddled into his warmth.  
"Need is when…when something is detrimental to you, important to your survival. Want is just something you can live without, but it's nice to have".  
"But what if…what if I want and need you? What do you call that?" she sniffled.  
"I don't know" he said honestly.  
"I think it's love" Aniu gave his chest a soft little lick.  
"Why's that?" Rusty asked.  
"Because when you love someone, they're nice to have around and well, it's like they become a part of you, so they're important to your survival too. Love is when you can't live without the ones you love most".

Perceptive for one so young. Yep, she was going to be an alpha someday, he confirmed. She was going to be a good one, just like her mother. She'd grow up just fine without him. Aniu was only saying all this because of her nightmare. But then again…his eyes widened when he realized he'd called her sweetheart. Where the hell had that come from? Could it be that he honestly did love this little pup?

It was a painful realization, but it was true. Rusty loved this little one like his own! He'd let himself get attached, felt his walls crumble, and had trusted her and her mother. And now look where he was! It would do him no good. What was the matter with him?! Could he really grow attached to someone so fast, in such a short span of time, knowing so little about them? He didn't know but one thing he was sure of: He loved this little pup and would do anything to keep her safe.

"I love you, Rusty" her little voice pulled him from his thoughts.

The wolf dingo let out a soft gasp, as if something in him hurt, which he would be lying if he said something didn't. He remembered why he'd hardened his heart, it was too painful to feel. He'd let Maddie down, what made him think he wouldn't do the same to Aniu? Could he bear the sorrow if he failed this little pup? Well, it was what he was going to have to do. Besides, she'd grow up fine without him. He'd fade from her memory, as she would most likely fade from his.

"But I don't want her to" he thought, "her or her mother".

Her mother…he thought of Aleu briefly. Earlier she had pretty much extended an invitation to be the alpha of her pack, to be her mate. For two years he'd been alone, uncared for, and left wondering if going back was the right path to take. With Aleu and Aniu, he didn't feel all of that. With them, he was loved, if only by at least one of them, but it was love and it was there, his for the taking. But he wouldn't force anything on Aleu. Rusty knew the only reason she'd take him as a mate was because one, he had potential to be a good alpha (At least in her opinion) and two, to act as a father to Aniu. Sure, they were…decent reasons, but they weren't the right ones. If he wanted to take a mate, he wanted her to love him first, not just have a mate out of convenience.

That just brought him back to the question from earlier: If his circumstances were different, could he have loved her? Could she have loved him? Could have, could have, could have! God…he wanted to go find a tree and bang his head against it, but…it would do nothing but cause a few head injuries. Not to mention he had little Aniu snuggled against him, trying to sleep.

"Rusty?"  
"Yes, sweetheart?" God! There it went again!  
"Did you hear me? I said I love you".  
"I…I…" he wasn't sure he could say it, "I don't know what to say young one. I'm the one least deserving of your love".  
"Why do you say that?"  
"I'm not like you".  
"So what? Love knows no boundaries, mama says".  
"And she's right, but I don't deserve it, Aniu. Yours is a pure love, a true love, and I'm…neither of those things".  
"You're good. You love me and mama, you're just too afraid to admit it. But I know it. I can feel it here" she put an ear over his heart, "In your heart".

Again, this pup rendered him speechless! How was it she was able to see past all that he was? Couldn't she see that he didn't deserve her love?! Or anyone's love for that matter?! Who was he but a wolf dingo, hybrid bastard in the eyes of those who were pure? But she was right also, love knew no boundaries, so maybe, just maybe, he deserved a speck of love. But surely not all of it! All his love was right here, snuggled close, sharing his warmth and seeing the side of him that he'd only ever shown Madeline. His heart began to throb painfully at the emotions bombarding him and sent his head swimming. It was like…like his very heart was right there, beating through little Aniu. Who was he to deny her what love he could give her, even if it was for a short time? Rusty's eyes stung as he licked the little ball of white fur.

"I love you too sweetheart" he finally allowed himself to say, "And I promise, I'll never truly leave you".

She fell asleep snuggled to him, the beat of his heart her perfect lullaby. As for Rusty, he couldn't sleep due to all these new thoughts and emotions. But now this only would make things harder.

He didn't want to leave them anymore.

"But you have to" a part of him said, "Madeline…she's counting on you to come back. And will you let her down again? Will you break her heart once more, just so that yours can be put back together? Besides…they don't need you. They just want you".

Well maybe they did want him but truth be told he wanted them too. Maybe…maybe Aleu could forget the pack! Move back to Nome with him and his family! They could be on the police force together! Rusty had no doubt Aleu would make a fine officer and Madeline would have a new playmate in Aleu. Everyone would be happy! It was the perfect solution!

Except she wouldn't forget the pack. She wouldn't leave them, not even for him. The thought saddened him but it was the truth. Her duty was to them first, and wasn't that what this was all about? Duty and loyalty…his was to Madeline and Inspector Aubrey, to the town of Nome itself. Hers was to her daughter and her pack. No! He wouldn't come between them! It wasn't right. He was leaving them, and that was that! If worse came to worst he'd learn to live without them! It'd be hard, but he'd learn. Damned if he didn't at least try! The wolf dingo growled with newly found resolution. He wouldn't dare falter or think such impossible, dreamy thoughts again.

But inside, Rusty wept…


	12. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

_I am by your side where love will find you. _

Aleu woke the next morning to a most heart touching sight outside the burrow. Aleu was cuddled into Rusty's chest, as he simply lied on his belly, head down and eyes close reverently. That moment Aleu would keep forever implanted in her mind. In that moment, the wolf dingo looked like a father.

His breathing was calm and even. The storm in his heart died some, but still was shocked over the newly found emotions. Rusty sniffed and detected Aleu. Well, let her see. Maybe things would be different if she saw him like this, at his most vulnerable. He opened his eyes and looked up at her as she started moving toward them.

"She had a nightmare. She didn't wanna wake you so she turned to me" he explained.  
"No need to explain. But you two look so precious together, you know that".  
"Well don't expect to see things like this all the time. She just needed someone to comfort her" Rusty gave Aniu a gentle lick, "C'mon little one, we gotta get up".  
"No…" she mumbled, "It's so warm..."  
"I promise, we'll snuggle later, but we gotta keep going".  
Aniu opened one of her light blue eyes. "Promise?"  
"Have you ever known me to break my word, love?"  
"No".  
"Well then" he nudged her up and got up himself, "Let's get going".  
"Oh! I wanna be carried! Can I please be carried, Rusty. Please!" Aniu looked up at him eagerly.  
The wolf dingo stretched a couple minutes. "Well…" He looked at Aleu, "If it's alright with you".  
"Oh go ahead. It's okay. I trust you with her".  
"Yay!" The pup jumped and playfully batted at Rusty's muzzle.

Gentle as can be, Rusty picked up Aniu by the scruff of her neck as she curled up, laughing all the while as if she were being tickled. Aleu watched and felt her heart warm even more. This was what she'd been talking about with him last night. He was a good man, and he would make a wonderful father for Aniu…and anyone else that would come along. If only he could see what she did. He had a wonderful heart, he was caring and patient and loving. He was just…perfect. It endeared this strange wolf dingo more to her than anything. Sure he had it rough, but he no longer let that roughness show with Aniu. Never once had she seen him act out of cruelty, which proved her point further that he was the perfect father. He didn't see himself as good, but Aleu could see nothing but his light.

_Remember what once was told to you_, a voice, female, calm and soothing, sounded in Aleu's mind, _The love of one can change all hearts. His is a delicate one. Wait for him, but do not lose your hope._

It was Aniu, the White Wolf, her grandmother, and her daughter's namesake. Ever since Aleu had begun her reign as Alpha over Nava's pack, she'd been guided by her grandmother's voice. But how did she know of Rusty? Hm…Aleu didn't respond but was resolved to obey. The alpha followed Rusty and her daughter close behind.

Finally they made it to the Great Water. In order to make it across, it was just as Aleu had feared. They'd need to swim, as there weren't any ice drifts for them this time. They'd melted. Aniu looked afraid as Rusty set her down.

"What are we gonna do?" she asked.  
"We'll make it. We've made it this far. Just gotta think of a plan" he replied, trying to think of a safe way to get both of them across.  
"You said you could carry her, right?" Aleu asked and Rusty nodded.  
"Problem is I'm sure this gets pretty damn deep, am I right?"  
"Yeah it does" Aleu shuddered at the memory of her fight with Niju, how she'd slipped into the cold water beneath the ice bridge.  
"I'll go first" Rusty suggested, "I'm gonna see if I can find an ice raft. There's gotta be at least one".  
"I don't see any".  
"Well no, maybe not all of them have melted. Some might just be far away. C'mon…caribou once crossed this water, right? So why can't we?"  
"Rusty…Just be careful. I don't like this idea".  
"Relax, I'll be fine. I've been through worse things than this, I promise".  
"Rusty" Aniu tugged at his tail again and he looked down at her, "I don't like this plan either".  
"Hey" the wolf dingo gave her a reassuring lick, "I promised you we'll snuggle later, I'll make it back and fulfill my promise. I swear. Have faith in me, and remember, I love you".

Aleu's ears perked when she heard that. He said it. He'd finally said it! He loved her daughter, and that was more than enough reason for her. Rusty was putting his life on the line for their safety first, which was yet another endearing trait to her. With every new quality, every new layer uncovered, Aleu found herself more and more fascinated with him. Or was it something other than fascination? The wolf dingo made his way over to her, a soft but determined look on his face.

"I know you made your offer to me last night, and I appreciate it. But let me be the first to tell you that if I do take a mate, Aleu, I want it to be for the right reasons. I want to love and to be loved in return. I know surely you can understand that" he told her like it was a secret.  
"And like I asked before, could you have loved me?"  
Rusty moved just a little closer, so close only she could hear his answer. "Yes, I could've. And…still could".

Aleu gave him a surprised look, but Rusty pulled away before she could say anything else. He plunged into the cold water to search for any chance of getting the two others across. He didn't feel the cold water too much, as his fur and skin were fairly thick. It was only a minor bother. Rusty felt weightless underwater, and he struggled to keep his eyes open, as they burned. When he came up for air at last, he was at least two miles away from the shore.

"Didn't realize I could swim that fast…" he thought and kept his head above water long enough to catch his breath some.

Despite his mission, he only had one thing on his mind: Aleu and Aniu. What he'd told Aleu was true. He could love her, it wouldn't be hard. But he needed to at least know if the one he loved most was safe and secure. If something happened to Madeline while he was gone…he didn't know what he'd do. The only way he could start his future was to reconcile his past and at last make his heart his own. Only then would it finally be his to give. But right now it just wasn't possible.

But he loved Aniu, that much he knew. But why her and not her mother? Well, no, he did love Aleu in a strange, distant way. But why wasn't it as strong as he felt for Aniu? Was it his philosophy about a child's love? Was that what he wanted? All his life it'd been sufficient. Why now was he craving something more? Rusty's thoughts raced more and more as he went up for air a second time.

A short ways away there was something floating, something long. A loose patch of ice perhaps? The wolf dingo went closer to investigate, his mind clearing for just a moment. Yes! At last, something he could safely get them on and hopefully get home! But how to get it back to them? Could it be pushed? Could he push it more importantly? Rusty swam behind it and tried with his paws first, but it didn't go where he wanted it to. He had to find a way to climb on top without slipping, from there he could move it against the current.

Rusty's claws, thanks to his dingo heritage, were more hooked than a wolf. He'd have a closer, tighter grip to the ice, at least he hoped.

"Well, here goes nothing!" he grabbed a hold of the ice raft, literally jamming his claws into the ice.

It was horribly uncomfortable. The claws were thinner than a wolf's also thanks to his dingo blood. The nerves just beyond his quick screamed in protest as he pulled himself up, using his claws like small ice hooks. Rusty ignored it and kept climbing until finally he was on top of the raft. Finally, he could get them back and get himself home…at least he hoped. The wolf dingo started to move the raft with his movements and using his paw to paddle through the water. He howled out for Aleu and Aniu. He was close, and he'd found something.

"It's him!" Aniu wagged her tail, "He's coming mama!"  
"I know. At last…".

Could she love him? It was the same for her as it was for him. It wouldn't be hard to love him, just…there was something dark in him, this past looming over his head. If he just opened up more, learned to trust, he'd be more than lovable. Not to mention he wasn't too bad looking either. He had the body shape of a wolf, but the beautiful light sandy brown coloring of a dingo. His shoulders and the top of his spine were striped in black. His eyes were, at least in certain lights a strange mix of yellow and brown, they looked almost golden in certain areas.

And his heart…god how could she describe it? She knew he was good underneath it all. There was still love left in it, but it'd been frozen over for so long that perhaps he forgot how to feel it until Aniu reawakened it. Maybe she could make it better, but how she didn't know. Aleu still wanted to know more about him, but wouldn't push the issue. She wanted to Rusty to feel comfortable, to trust her with the darkness he kept to himself. Soon though, soon she'd know everything if he stayed true to their deal.

Her heart raced as he approached with the ice raft. It wasn't huge, but it was just big enough to hold all three of them. Aniu rushed out to greet him as he jumped back on to the shore.

"You came back!" she snuggled into his front legs as he licked her head.  
"I promised didn't I?" he chuckled a little.  
"You always keep your promises don't you?"  
"I always try to, love" he looked at Aleu with an assuring smile, "We don't have much time, we can ride the current back to the other side. From there we'll venture to Nome".

Aleu found all she could do was nod as Rusty helped them on to the ice raft.


	13. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

_What about now? What about today? What if you're making me all that I was meant to be? _

What amazed Rusty was just how well Aniu could sleep under almost any circumstance. The poor pup was bored out of her little mind and chasing Rusty's tail wasn't a very good option as they were still on the ice raft, so the little pup took advantage of the time and decided to sleep. Rusty couldn't. His emotions and thoughts were running high, and he could hardly contain his excitement. By Aleu's prediction, he would be home in about three days or more.

Three days…that was all he had with the pup and her mother. The question of whether or not he could leave them in good conscience plagued him again, despite his efforts to hold it back. Rusty could feel Aleu's eyes on him, though he had his back turned to her. She was watching him, thinking it odd that the tip of his tail was twitching in an oddly catlike fashion. He looked like he was deep in thought and she didn't want to disturb him.

But what was he thinking of that could cause him so much turmoil? Was he regretting their deal of telling her his story eventually? She kept an eye on him, worrying that he was regretting all this, having met her and all that they were going through now. And then there was the matter of what he'd said earlier. He could love her, he said it himself. So what was holding him back? Really, what was stopping him? Was it her? Did he not find her good enough, being a hybrid herself? From what she'd heard about dingoes, they prided themselves in being pure bred. Chances were he was looking for someone either pure wolf or pure dingo. And he wasn't going to find a pure dingo here….

Aleu knew she also could love him, like said before, but only if there wasn't so much darkness in him. And even that wasn't too much for her to handle. She cared about him, wanted to see that darkness, those shadows gone. What could've caused him to go so dark, so cold despite all the love he held? It all went back to his mysterious past. What was so horrible he couldn't bear to tell her here?

"Rusty…" she finally spoke.  
The wolf dingo turned and faced her. "Aleu…is there something wrong?".  
She got up and came to his side. "Listen…I know we have a bargain, but I think what you said was a bit of a game changer. If love is what you want for us, you need to let me in. I want to help, but I can't do that entirely if you don't tell me things about yourself. At least tell me half of your story…please".  
"You wouldn't understand right now. The things I keep to myself I keep for a reason, Aleu. It isn't that I don't trust you, I just don't wish to scare you. You've seen mostly good humans. I…I have met maybe a handful of good humans. I don't want to ruin humanity for you".  
"Did I ever tell you a human tried to shoot me?"  
"What?! When?!"  
"A couple years back, before I learned of my own heritage. He mistook me for a full wolf, since I guess I look more wolf than papa does".  
"If I didn't know any better I'd think you were full wolf too. You seem too strong to be half dog, and I mean strong in every sense of the word".  
"Thanks. But I like the way you look. You have the best features of both wolf and dingo, though I've never actually seen a dingo. I know I'm breaking our bargain, but I have to know if you want what you said earlier to happen".  
"My past should be of little consequence to you, Aleu. It would be dishonorable if I told you my story now. I plan to uphold our bargain until we get to Nome. I made a promise and I intend to keep it".  
"I'll keep wondering, Rusty and I can't do that anymore. God, don't you see that I care?! I just wanna help you deal with whatever the heck happened back then. Obviously you're not over it and you're not going to be until you tell someone. What are you afraid of?"  
"I'm not afraid of anything, Aleu. I'm a canine of my word, simply that".  
"You're afraid we'll turn against you".  
"No I'm afraid of ruining how you see humanity. As I said, you've seen the best in people. I haven't. My father was shot and killed by a human, just for protecting my mother. And she was killed by a human for…for…god I won't even say that was out of sport! That was hell, that was what that was! A time I don't wish to relive again".  
"What happened?" Aleu was now more concerned than curious.

He'd been orphaned at a young age, and by humans on top of that. His scars ran deeper than she thought. Rusty had been traumatized since puppyhood. Only two humans had ever given him kindness, the rest cruelty, she realized. That's why he kept to himself. He didn't think anyone else cared. But she was here now, and she cared.

Why did she want to know? What was it any business of hers of his past? Why did she care? He didn't want to tell her, but at the same time…his heart yearned to tell her the truth. But to do that would mean to let go, to tear down the walls he'd built so strongly around it. He'd been strong all these years because of them. And if he trusted her, and she trusted him, and if Madeline and Inspector Aubrey were still in Nome like he hoped, all he'd do was fail her. He'd let her down, like he did with Maddie. He couldn't do that to anyone else again. It was bad enough he was going to hurt little Aniu, would he do the same to her mother before it was time? He loved them, in his own way, but he didn't want to. Not as much as he did now. He wanted to care about them, that was it. He didn't…Rusty didn't want to NEED them like he felt he did.

"She was shot" he told her, "That is all I can tell you, Aleu. For now at least. Forgive me".

Aleu's ears drooped and she looked hopeless and, dare he think it, broken hearted. His own heart was broken, it always had been, but that was just how life was to him. It was just one big disappointment. He'd never known his father, his mother died protecting him, and his mother's pack had pretty much rejected him before he was ever even born for just being what he was. He'd never asked for it. He'd never asked to be half wolf, he'd never even asked to be born.

Life was miserable, yet precious in a way he couldn't describe. If it hadn't been for the Aubrey family, he would've found a way to kill himself a long time ago. If it weren't for his hope now, he would've already been dead. Hell, he'd tried to freeze himself not too long ago, but look how that turned out. But now he couldn't even bear the thought of trying. The idea of suicide was repulsive to him. There was a little girl who needed him to come home, and he needed to prove his love still rang true to her and her father. Then there was little Aniu, who was so much like Madeline it almost scared him. He couldn't die because she needed him too and he faced it, he needed her too as a means of keeping his very sanity intact. Yes, his heart was broken, but what could he do about it? That's why he longed for love, longed for that unconditional, true, pure love of a child, his child. That's why he needed to get back to her. It wasn't much, but for god's sake, Rusty knew he needed to move on with his life! The past wasn't important, but yet to him it was. The humans in their cruelty had shaped him into who and what he was now. And it wasn't just them either.

The dogs he'd met both in Australia and in Nome had been less than accepting. The dogs were like his mother's pack had been. They considered themselves "civilized" and "pure in heart". Well who were they to say he wasn't? All he had to do was look at his reflection or look down at his lithe paws and then he'd be reminded of the reason why he was labeled differently from them.

And the dogs of Nome…oh god! How he hated most of them! They were hardly any different, if not worse than the dogs in Australia. The only difference was that they couldn't tell him outright what they thought as he could've easily taken them down, which he did every so often. They were superficial, prideful, and hateful towards everyone but themselves. One in particular he'd actually wanted dead, more than anything. Steele had been his nightmare, his enemy for months before he was separated from his family. The moment the damn malamute learned of his wild heritage, the insults and fights started. What made it especially irritating to Rusty that he couldn't throw the malamute's ass into prison because well, according to the humans, he could do no wrong. Back then, the wolf dingo had been hell bent on gathering evidence against him. But he never managed to before Madeline got sick. That was when all his attention turned to her.

However, that wasn't fair to label ALL of them like that. Jenna, as he recalled, was a very giving husky, and, after saving her that one night, she often times would give him a kind hello and a smile while he was on patrol. She'd also, when times demanded, volunteered to keep an eye out for crimes and report them right to him. She would've made a fine officer, and she'd passed that on to her daughter. Rusty let himself smile a little at the thought of the kind husky. He wondered if she was doing well, Balto too.

Soon he'd know though. He'd know the truth and so would Aleu.


	14. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

_What if our love never went away? _

The conversation had been brief, but it left much on Rusty's mind. It made him reflect on who he really was, deep down. He knew he wasn't wolf, or dingo, but a mix of both. Just as the one who took care of him after his accident told him. He was stronger than both, she'd said…

"Snowdrift…" he whispered the name he knew for her aloud while the girls slept, "I wish you were here. Could use your help" he closed his eyes.

"I am here" a calm, quiet, feminine voice sounded in his mind, the voice of a friend.  
"Snowdrift, what do I do? What can I do?"

Suddenly it was like the white wolf who'd tended his wounds was there, proud and strong, but gentle in her demeanor. Her face was soft but in her golden eyes there was power, power that he'd seen only once before, in those of his mother. Rusty regarded the pure white wolf as such. He gave her a graceful bow.

"You are on the right path. This is what you want, is it not?" she asked.  
"I don't know what I want anymore. That's why I need your help. I need to know…am I doing the right thing?"  
"By yourself perhaps" Snowdrift made her way around Aleu and Aniu's sleeping forms, "But not by them".  
"How can I appease both? How can I go with one without shunning the other?"  
"All will fall into place soon enough. But tell me, how do you feel about them?"  
"I love Aniu, like she was my own. I want to help her, to raise her the right way, to be the father that mine couldn't be, but that I'm sure would've been".  
"And didn't her mother offer this chance to you?"  
"Yes, she did, but I want a mate out of love, not convenience".  
"There is love in it. You both love the child as your own. As you know, the little one was adopted by her".  
"I know of this. I planned to ask how Aleu came to have her. But perhaps you know. She looks like you".  
The white wolf looked down at the sleeping pup. "So she does. But there is love between you two. It is the child who brings you together, and ultimately the child who will keep you together".  
"Are you saying I abandon Madeline for them?! You know I can't do that! I owe that little girl everything".  
"You owe her nothing now. You haven't owed her anything for the past two years. Aubrey…Dear Aubrey forgive what I say, as you are loving and gentle and good hearted, but you are still thinking as a tamed dingo, something you have never truly fallen out with".  
"I can't deny who I am".  
"And yet you do all the time. You call yourself Rusty when you know very well who you are".  
"Aubrey died the day he was separated from that little girl. When he broke his promise to her".  
"She understood, you know. Yes she trusted you, and despaired at your disappearance but she, a child of only six years, understood what you apparently cannot".  
"And that is?"  
"That you are a thing of the wild. You are wild on both sides of your family. You have molded yourself into a dog instead of what you are because you cannot accept what you are. Tell me, do you honestly think yourself any different from the dogs who held you in poor taste?"

The question stung deeper than it should've. Really, she was right. All his life Rusty (As Aubrey) had been trying to fit in with the dogs whom he was constantly surrounded with. But despite his efforts, it never worked. They hated him, no matter what he tried. The wolf dingo sighed. When he said nothing, Snowdrift made her way toward him and gave his head a reassuring lick.

"As I ask, forgive what I say, as I do not mean to cause you further turmoil. Whether or not you're doing the right thing is based on your perspective. You wish to go back to her, and I will not stop you, and neither will your…friends? No, I wouldn't call them that. They're family to you aren't they?"  
"They're like family. Snowdrift…if Madeline wants me back, I'll hurt them. That's the last thing I want to do, but if I pick them over Maddie, I fear she'll never see or think of me in the same way again. I'll lose her love, worse than I already have".  
"My poor young one, you have never lost her love. And never shall you lose theirs. It does not matter who you choose, it is simply a matter of choosing what it is your heart truly desires. And I believe you and I both know what it is".  
"I can't leave them".  
"So don't".  
"But I need to know if Madeline still loves me".  
"She never stopped loving you…not even in the end".  
Her last sentence caught his attention. "What are you saying?! Is Madeline alright?!".

The white wolf gave him only her usual soft look, howled and disappeared into the mist. Rusty's heart thundered in his chest. It couldn't be…could it?

"No…no she can't be gone. I refuse to believe it!" he growled at the thought.

But then again, she'd been one of the first to catch the illness…could it be that the medicine wasn't delivered to her in time? She was near death when he left, so…oh no…the thought made him want to cry, and his eyes stung. No…he wouldn't believe it. Madeline was alive and well, waiting for him to come home. Once again, the wolf dingo was resolute. He'd return to her and then all this mess would be over. He'd be safe and back with the girl he loved most. He'd harden his heart again to the wolves and the girl would again be his only reason for living.


	15. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find? Baby before it's too late…_

Aleu and Aniu woke a little time before Rusty spotted land. Needless to say, the wolf dingo again didn't sleep. He refused to believe what the white wolf had said. Maddie had to be alive. She just had to be. What was the point of life if she wasn't there? This journey would be for nothing.

But what if Snowdrift was right? What if the little girl was gone and he was alone? What would he do? Where would he go? Sure he had Aleu and Aniu, but what if he was still needed in Nome? What about the Inspector? Surely he'd be needed. But what would he be fighting for if not for Madeline? His job would consume him and he wouldn't let that happen again. Also, he wasn't going to stay where he was neither accepted or welcome. It was a new reason to journey on: Just to see if his child was alive. If so, he'd stay just to be with her. If not, then he'd leave the town and face an unknown, quite possibly dark, future.

No words were exchanged until at last they were close enough to shore to swim. Rusty carried Aniu as she was still too small to get over there herself. She knew something was wrong but the pup said nothing. Aleu could sense it too, but she thought it was from his lack of sleep. When they got to the shore, the alpha nuzzled his neck a little, as if to comfort him. To her surprise and to his own, Rusty responded to her touch in kind, even going as far as to give her a light lick on the cheek.

"You need to get some sleep" she told him.  
"We can't stop now. We need to get to Nome as quickly as possible now".  
"Rusty…you're exhausted, I can tell by looking at you. You've hardly slept since we left home. Please, please lay down and get some sleep".  
"I have to get there! I think something's wrong Aleu, but I can't tell you what it is".  
"Nothing's wrong Rusty. You just need to sleep. I know what happens when you sleep, but it's the best way to get your energy back. I'll find us some food too, so we'll be ready for tomorrow. Today we'll all rest".

The wolf dingo sighed, knowing he'd lose this fight. Aleu was insistent and assertive in a way he couldn't name, but he knew what she said, went. Plain and simple. She was still alpha after all. The trio found a cave to use a temporary shelter and Aleu went off to hunt, leaving him with Aniu. The little white pup took her place next to Rusty, sitting just a little clumsily and looking at him curiously.

"What?" he asked.  
"What happened?"  
"What do you mean?"  
"Something's happened. Something's changed, I can feel it".  
"Nothing's changed".  
"You promised a snuggle session yesterday, it didn't happen".  
"Oh, so I did. I apologize" Rusty stretched himself out, "Come on over sweetie".

The pup smiled and made her way over to him. She curled up into his warmth as he himself curled around her, putting his tail over her like a protective, warm blanket. Aniu kept an ear on him, hearing his breathing and heartbeat. Her suspicions disappeared, he was fine. Nothing changed. Her nightmare had simply been that, a horrible fantasy of the mind and nothing more. She was sure now that this creature wouldn't leave her.

"I've always wanted a papa" she told him, her thoughts trailing off, "I never knew mine".  
"Really? Well, if it's any help, I never knew mine either. He died before I was born".  
"I'm sorry. To be honest, I don't know where I come from".  
"You never knew either of your biological parents?"  
"Nope…mama says she found me when I was itty bitty. My eyes had just barely opened. I was all alone" the pup's ears drooped, "But she took me in and saved me. She wanted to find my real pack and parents but nobody she came across claimed me. So she made me hers".  
"At least you know she loves you".  
"And you love me too, right?"  
"Yes sweetheart I do".  
"And I love you too. Rusty, someday, could you come back?" Aniu asked.  
"I promised you I wasn't gonna leave. I'm not leaving just yet little one. Besides, for all you know, I could choose you and your mother over my humans".  
"I hope you do" she said, her ears drooping again, "You're the only thing close to a papa that I have".  
"I don't think I'd be a good father, little one".  
"I think you're good. Mama thinks so too. You love us and you'd do anything to keep us safe right?"  
"Of course I would and yes, I do".  
"Besides, you and mama look good together I think".  
Rusty chuckled. "Nah I think she's too good for me".  
"Funny, I think she thinks the same about you".  
"Really? How so?"  
"She dreams of you. I hear her mumble your name in her sleep".

Interesting. So she did see him in some kind of romantic light. He didn't share those dreams though, as he usually either dreamed of his humans or found himself reliving the hell he'd gone through as a pup. Only when Aniu was around did those dreams seem to fade away, and the dreams he had with her he could never remember for the life of him. But at least they refreshed him and offered him relief from the pain of the past.

When Aleu returned she'd caught two rabbits. One for herself and the other for Rusty. He devoured the rabbit, as he hadn't eaten in some time. Only after eating did the wolf dingo realize just how tired he really was. He watched Aleu and Aniu eat, a sleepy, somewhat dreamy look in his eyes. Rusty sighed thinking of what he and Aniu talked about. He could be a father to her, but that would mean depriving Aleu of a mate who loved her truly. To be honest, his emotions were too mixed to determine if he did love her. Besides, he didn't really think he'd make a good mate, much less a father and even less a pack leader. A pack wasn't a canine police force. Sure he was used to leadership, but…nothing like that. And besides, once the harnesses were off and duty was done, his inferiors went back to hating him. Aleu's pack was hardly any different. They knew about dingoes and their now tarnished reputation. They used it as a means to irritate and bully him, not that he really cared because he was blameless. What had happened to the human child had nothing to do with him.

His eyelids started to get heavy, very heavy. He yawned and stretched his long body out. Growling softly, Rusty allowed himself to fall into a deep sleep.


	16. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

_What about now? Now that we're here, now that we've come this far, just hold on. _

Rusty woke to the sound of a deep seated snarl. Aleu was standing stiff legged in front of him, her body tense and blue eyes burning in anger. In front of her there was a large black wolf. Someone she knew, perhaps? Rusty shook off his drowsiness and rose to see what the problem was.

"Aleu is everything-"  
"Rusty, bet back! This wolf, this thing cannot be trusted!" Aleu snapped her jaw as the wolf tried to come closer, "Back off, Niju!"  
"You know him?" Rusty asked, looking slightly confused.  
"Well looks like the little half breed has found one for herself…strange looking creature you are" the wolf, Niju, looked over at Rusty.  
"I'm a hybrid as well. Wolf and dingo".  
"Ah, that explains it…and the weird accent too. Hand the child over, she's not yours to keep!"  
"And what makes you think she's yours?!" Rusty went stiff as well with anger.

This wolf wanted Aniu. Damned if he'd let him have her! He went as far as to try to snarl, and Aleu noticed something. A few of Rusty's back teeth were missing. How did he lose them, she wondered. But she went back to the situation at hand.

"The girl is a child of the wild. She belongs to no one. Nava before he died predicted her coming. I see his old magic tricks held some truth after all".  
"What the hell are you talkin' about?" Rusty growled.  
Niju looked at Aleu. "You know of her, the white wolf, Aniu".  
"Aniu?" the wolf dingo looked confused at Aleu.  
"My grandmother, the leader of the pack before Nava. My Aniu is named after her".  
"Oh no she's not…don't you see? The child IS Aniu, but in another form. Just a reincarnation of who she once was. That's nobody's claimed her, correct me if I'm wrong".  
"Irrelevant" Rusty snarled, "The circumstances of one's birth are unimportant. It is what one does with their life that ultimately determines who and what they are. You, for example, I can tell are a coward and a lowly thief. I used to deal with scum like you".  
"Scum?! Look who's talking, filthy blood!".

That was enough to set him off. Rusty literally jumped over Aleu and tackled Niju to the ground, holding him down with all four legs grabbing him by the neck with his fangs. It was so quick it surprised even Aleu and never before did her companion look more wolf like than he did now. His eyes, for just a moment, those strange brown yellow eyes turned molten gold in his anger. In that moment, he was an Alpha and Aleu couldn't help but acknowledge that in her mind.

Aniu stayed behind Aleu. She didn't understand what was happening, but she knew this was about her. All she knew was that her friend was fighting for her. But the mood was just far too angry, the sight of her friend latched on to her mother's enemy's throat too frightening. Her little eyes started to water and she let out a thin squeak.

"Don't kill him!" she cried.

Rusty briefly looked over to see Aniu in between Aleu's two front legs, little tears streaming down her face. She was cowering, afraid. Afraid of what though? Of Niju? Of him? No, she couldn't be afraid of him, he was her closest friend. No…not in that moment he wasn't. Rusty let go of Niju, not wanting to frighten the poor pup any more. He let out a soft, almost sweet whine to her. The puppy didn't move, and neither did Niju. Rusty had bitten in too deep. He'd killed the wolf…

"Oh no…no, no, no, sweetheart I never meant to-"

Aniu moved further away as he approached. Aleu for her part didn't know what to think. She knew it was an accident and she knew Rusty had killed one of her wolves when they first met, but to actually witness it was something else entirely. The wolf dingo looked pleadingly at the puppy.

"Please, sweetheart I wouldn't hurt you for the world-"  
"No!" Aniu shook her head, "You just killed someone…Rusty how could you?"  
"He was threatening you. I did what I did to protect you. Love, it was an accident. I never meant for it to happen the way it did. I would never hurt you".  
"But you killed someone…"

It was true. What had come over him? He'd wanted to protect Aleu and Aniu, but he had never intended to kill. He was right, it'd been an accident. Still though, now there was more blood on his hands and this time, it was a memory that would most likely be imprinted into the little pup's mind. He looked at Aleu.

"Take her home. I'll make my own way back".  
"Are you crazy?! You'll only get even more lost!".  
"I…she can't bear the sight of me anymore and I can't blame her. I'm no longer any greater than the criminals I used to hunt. Forgive me, Aleu. But please…take her home and have her forget about me".  
"Rusty, what you did was in defense of all of us here. Niju was a wild dog, if you hadn't stepped in he would've killed us. Aniu, sweetie" Aleu looked over at her daughter, "What just happened was an accident. He never meant to kill Niju, but it was necessary. He was trying to protect us".  
"He still killed someone".  
"The girl's right. It makes me no better than the criminals I used to hunt. Aleu she's not safe with me. Right now I don't feel like anyone is".  
Aleu gave Rusty a soft, somewhat sympathetic look. "I trust you. What you did was in our defense. Besides, we've gotten this far and we can't just leave now. You could get even more lost and you'll be wandering around for another two years. I won't abandon you now".  
"Aleu-"  
"Rusty, it's okay. I promise. We'll be there in a few more days and you'll be home. Everything's gonna be fine".  
The wolf dingo sighed. "I can only hope so…now let's get going".

**A/N: Holy crud, I can't believe that people love this story sooooo much. Needless to say I'm a very happy author right now. Just thought I'd give you guys a little insight on something. One of my friends read this story and they liked it and asked me this: If this was actually made into an animated movie, who would be voicing Rusty? Well, I'll give you guys two options: Either Russell Crowe or Sam Worthington (You know, that hot guy from Avatar and Terminator Salvation?). I personally prefer Crowe myself but it's whatever. Anyway, it's funny 'cause I recently found out that Rusty is actually one of Russell Crowe's nicknames. I seriously didn't know that until after I started this! Anyway, I'm glad you guys like it, please bear with me. It's almost done. Thanks again. **


	17. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

_There is nothing to fear, for I am right beside you. _

Aniu stayed close to Aleu for the rest of the trip. They didn't run into too many difficulties though Aleu mourned the death of predecessor. Nava had been a wise kind wolf and Rusty again found himself wondering what it would've been like to have met him. But now he needed to harden his heart again. He was a killer in the eyes of the one he cared most for and nothing he could say or do could change that. If that meant being alone because of it, so be it. He was as he'd always been: Alone.

Except now he didn't want to be. He didn't have to be. Aleu was there, and time and time again she told him she would be here for him. And despite what she thought of him now, he still loved Aniu, no matter how much he tried to deny it now. The pup and her mother meant more to him than he'd ever allow himself to admit. The wolf dingo was brought back to the same question: Could he bring himself to abandon them in the end?

"Yes" he kept telling himself, "I have to. Aniu can't stand the sight of me, and Aleu…hell, she'll get over me. I'll learn to live without them. I did it before I can do it again".

But he didn't believe it. And not to mention what Snowdrift said kept coming back to mind. He also was a thing of the wild, but had only allowed himself to live the life of a creature he knew he wasn't. She knew he was meant for greater things than being an officer, than being a little girl's guardian. Sure, both gave his life meaning, made it special, but it wasn't what he was entirely meant for. But if not for that, then what?

The outlaw wolf spoke in riddles all the time, which, when he first met her, left him annoyed. But she'd nursed him back to health without complaint and introduced him to the ways of the wolf, something he never thought he would learn. See, he'd always known he was a wolf, but never once had he considered learning about that part of himself. He thought as the dogs did, that the wolves here were mostly savages. But Snowdrift was quick to reeducate him. Sure, yes, they were vicious when they had to be, but a good wolf, one in touch with the Great Spirit, never acted out of cruelty. In a way, they were hardly different dingoes.

But that didn't mean he'd fully accepted it. He'd seen the worst in all sides, wolves, dingoes, and dogs. Snowdrift had been the first to treat him with kindness since his mother died. His heritage was irrelevant to her. She was right, that he needed to accept what he was rather than live his life denying it. Rusty took the words to heart.

They were just outside the town when it was dark again. Aleu was in no hurry to head back in, but Rusty was restless. He wanted to hurry on ahead, but his companion and her pup were hesitant. Aleu had never been fully accepted and she feared how humans would take to her daughter, especially at night.

"There's nothing to be scared of. I know most of the people who live in this town and their dogs. Trust me, I'm the scariest damn thing you're gonna see around here" he tried to assure her.  
"I just don't wanna risk it, Rusty. I know you want to head in, and you can if you want to on your own. But I don't think it'd be safe for Aniu".

He looked over at the pup, who was laying down in the soft grass, away from him, still afraid. His ears lowered and he tried one more time to approach her. The white ball of fur rushed back behind her mother, quivering. Seeing this pup afraid of him…it tore his heart apart anew. He'd never meant to kill in front of her, hell he never meant to kill Niju in the first place. Instincts had kicked in, and for a moment he lost control. Rusty gave her a soft whine and lowered himself down to his belly, practically crawling toward her, trying to look as docile as he felt.

"C'mere love. I promise, I swear on my life, I'd never, ever, ever hurt you. I'm so sorry sweetie. Don't be scared. I won't hurt you I promise".  
"You're already gonna leave us" she shuddered, her tiny voice a little squeaky.  
Rusty sighed. "No love, I'm not. Not yet. Possibly not ever".  
"I want a papa…" she told him.  
"I know, and I want to be what you want but as I told you I'm not what you need".

Aleu watched and listened with a quiet curiosity. She moved a little and the puppy followed, only peeking out behind from her every so often to speak.

"And I already told you I needed you".  
"Your heart will tell you things like that, love. Doesn't make them true".  
"That's not true! Everything that comes from the heart is true! You know that!" she got bold and stood before him again without fear, "What does your heart say about us?! Hm?!"

He stood as well, reaching his full somewhat intimidating height. This required even further soul searching. What did his heart say? He knew he loved them. He loved Aniu as if she were his own daughter, like he'd loved Madeline. Aleu, secretly, was growing on him. All he knew was he didn't want to let them down. Going back to Madeline would hurt them and inside, he wanted to die at the very thought of them hurt. Rusty wanted to die, a part of him did, because of the choice he'd inevitably have to make. It was impossible. He couldn't make one happy without forsaking the other.

Madeline had been his savior. She'd pulled his soul out of the darkness it'd been born into. With her he found a home, love and a family, something he never thought he'd ever find with anyone else. She was a part of him, and to lose her was the death of him, the death of the light she'd brought back to him. Without her he had nothing, he was nothing.

Aniu and Aleu had also saved him. For two years he'd plunged himself back into the darkness, only coming back to the light every so often to help someone in need. Aniu had brought him back to the light the same way Madeline had, with the pure true innocence and love she had in her own heart towards him, a complete stranger, who not to mention had killed one of her mother's hunters. As for her mother, it was different. With her he experienced a new kind of love. Deep in his heart, Aleu was his. His to fight for, protect and cherish. He knew deep down there was no one equal to her. What he felt was strange but exciting. New, and yet it felt right. Like they were made for each other.

She would understand, Snowdrift had said. But would she really? He feared the worst. Indecision was weakness and he knew it. But these two were his weakness. He'd do anything for them.

"Damn" he thought.

With that thought, he knew the answer now. He knew his choice now. All that it really was a matter of was if he could fall through with it or not. Would he regret it later? Would he be hated? Would his Maddie understand? He loved them…they were his family, and well…maybe…maybe he could have a family of his own, with Aleu. At last he looked at Aniu and at Aleu.

"It tells me that I love you both. And it rings true. I will stay with you, that is, if you'll have me. Aleu…it's ultimately your choice".  
"Of course! We'd love to have you!" Aleu said a little too excitedly.

Did this mean that…that he loved her? He _loved_ her? Or was he still trying? There was one way to find out. The alpha stepped up to the wolf dingo and put her head to his. The tension was thick between them. Both had pent up feelings, but neither were sure how to express them. Neither had experienced anything like this. One had never known the love of his kind and the other had never known the love of a wolf towards his mate. Both could feel each other's heart's beating erratically. Aniu watched quietly, anticipating what was to come.

Rusty gently brushed his nose against Aleu's cheek, affection overflowing him. His head was cloudy, he wasn't thinking of anything but the girl before him and his desire to make her happy. He'd do anything, even leave his old life behind, just to see her smile. He gave her cheek a lick and she trembled just a little. He whispered in her ear.

"All this time…I can't believe it. I've been doomed from the start to love you".  
Aleu looked at him hopefully. "Really?".

There was a softness in his eyes she'd never seen before. His vulnerability was showing, and for the first time with her, he was letting go of everything. There wasn't a doubt in her mind. He loved her and she wasn't about to turn away a creature who not only wanted but needed her love.

"Yes, truly".

She licked his face gently and put her head against the soft fur of his neck. He rested his head against hers and Aniu made her way in, snuggling between them. In that moment, Rusty had all he could ever want: A mate and a pup who loved him. Never before had he felt so wanted, so _needed_ than in this moment.

"We'll go in the morning. You're right. We don't want to rouse the human's suspicion. Besides, I'm sure you'll want to see your father again while I go looking for Maddie".  
"Do you want to search alone? Maybe we can help".  
"We'll figure it out in the morning. C'mon" he broke away from them briefly and laid down, "Let's get some sleep".

Aniu smiled and hurried over to take her place at his side, snuggling close to his heart. Aleu took her place next to him, and put her head on his shoulder. He didn't pull away this time.

"My family…right here. All I could want is here".


	18. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

_For all my life I am yours. _

For the first time in two years, Rusty woke in comfort. Aniu was still asleep, snuggled to his chest and Aleu's head was at his side, as if she fell asleep nuzzling him. Perhaps she did. The wolf dingo allowed himself to smile. Last night, even with its troubles, had become kind to him, bestowing upon him something he long since thought he would never have again. A family. Wherever they would go, he would follow. But not until he was able to reconcile with his past.

Aleu stirred and finally woke, her blue eyes shining at the sight of her beloved's smile. She moved a little and gave his neck a little affectionate nuzzle. She felt the chain to his key and temptation again began to rise to ask him what this key was to.

"We're almost there" she said quietly so to not wake Aniu, "What is the key to?"  
"My old house" he didn't hesitate to tell her, "Hopefully the locks haven't been changed".  
"You mean, you're gonna introduce me to your family?" Aleu wagged her tail excitedly.  
"Yes, I plan to. Once I'm reconciled with them, when I get them to see who we are and what we mean to each other, I'm going back to the pack with you and Aniu".  
"I love you" she told him.  
Rusty licked her head. "I love you too".  
"As you know, I'm dying to know of the one that you were two years ago…please tell me some things?"  
"We're not in the town yet, our bargain stands. I was thinking though-"  
"Uh oh…"  
"What?"  
"You were thinking. No wonder my brain's been itching" she laughed a little.  
"Ha, ha very funny Aleu. But I was thinking maybe you could reintroduce me to your family".  
"You mean, you wanna see mama and papa again?"  
"I never really talked to your father. And since we're together and we're here, I think it only makes sense that we go and see them".  
"I'd love that. I think papa would remember you if he's seen you before".  
"Great. Let's wake the little one and see about it" he bent his head down and gave Aniu a delighted lick to her head, "C'mon little one. We're gonna go meet the family".  
"Five more minutes…" she mumbled sleepily and the two adults laughed.  
"It's not funny…"  
"Sure it is. C'mon sweetie, get up".  
"Mmmm…Rusty, it's so warm here. I don't wanna be cold".  
"You'll be fine. I'll carry you if you don't wanna walk".  
The pup immediately bolted up. "When do we go?!".  
"Oh so to that you get up? Oh well" he picked her up by the scruff, "Aleu, I think you know where your father is".  
"Follow me".

Rusty held on to Aniu as he followed Aleu over to the old abandoned ship. How he'd ever missed that he never knew. But it was an ideal hiding place for a wolf-dog he guessed. Wolf dog logic, never question it. He was suddenly nervous, full of fears. What if Balto didn't recognize him? Before, when he'd seen the wolf dog, he'd been an officer, well trained and well cared for. He looked raggedy now, his fur longer than it should've been. He'd introduce himself by his old name, in case the wolf dog forgot.

It'd been two years since he went by Aubrey. It was a name he wasn't all too willing to embrace just yet. But for the sake of memory he'd have to. He followed Aleu up onto the ship's deck and he set Aniu down.

"So this is where your dad hides, er, lives rather. Sorry…thinking like a cop again".  
"Did papa ever…do anything?"  
"Like a crime? No, never. Despite what the humans thought. I don't really think it would matter anymore anyway. He did save the town…and possibly my girl with it".

Aleu noticed he said possibly. Why did he say that? Before he was so sure she was at least alive. What had brought him this doubt all of a sudden? She'd question him later about it.

"Hold on, I know he's here somewhere. Just wait here for me".  
"No need" a voice sounded behind them.

The trio turned to see him standing just outside the cabin. He looked surprised and delighted to see his beloved daughter again. Balto hadn't changed much since Rusty saw him last, except the fact he was older and had a few gray patches of fur here and there. All in all, the years had been kind to him.

"Papa!" Aleu ran to her father and almost knocked him over in her rush.  
"Aleu, it's so good to see you again. I thought I'd never see my baby again".  
"Papa..." she looked a little stern, "Not in front of Rusty…".  
"Rusty?" Balto looked over at the wolf dingo and his eyes widened, "Inspector?! You're…you're alive!"  
"Balto" Rusty bowed his head.  
"So you two do know each other?" Aleu asked.  
"Are you kidding me? This guy could catch any criminal, no one, man or animal, was beyond his reach. Or at least the police boasted. Aleu, do you know who this is? This is Inspector Aubrey. His human was the chief inspector of police".  
"Yeah, he told me about that. But…Aubrey?".  
"It's…It's a long story".  
"You go by Rusty now? Why's that?"  
"It's an old name, I promised Aleu I'd tell her when we got into the town. What? Do they think I'm dead?"  
"Um…yeah. Actually. Oh man, how do I tell you this without upsetting you?"  
"What? It's alright whatever it is, speak".  
Balto looked at him sadly. "The good Inspector went back to Australia after you…disappeared".  
"And Madeline?" he asked, nearly too eagerly.  
"I…There's something I think you should see, good Inspector".  
"Oh no…" he thought, "This is it…"

Aniu for her part looked at Balto strangely. Why did he feel familiar to her? Was she supposed to know him? She said nothing but followed the adults into the town.

"C'mon, you gotta see Jenna again. The years have been good to us both and I know she'd love to see you again" Balto thought of a way to get Aubrey's mind off of his girl.  
"Of course. I'd love to see her again".

They came over to the beautiful husky's home and Balto was greeted warmly and Jenna was more than delighted to see her daughter and meet her granddaughter. Then her eyes fell on the former cop dog.

"Inspector?! You're back! You're alive! Oh thank god…It's been too long. It's just…there hasn't been anyone on the force compared to you. Please, please come in. My family's not home and I don't think they'd mind if I played hostess to one who I'm sure would've been commissioner one day" she told him and gave him a friendly smile, like she used to.  
"Of course, ma'am" they all went inside together and had a friendly meal and conversation.  
"So where have you been all this time?" Jenna asked.  
"Been kinda lost. I lived on my own for two years until Aleu here came and found me. And I believe I met another of your daughters".  
"Really?! Who?!"  
"Saba I believe her name was. She had a pup with her, Kanai".  
"You met one of my sisters and you didn't tell me?" Aleu asked.  
"I was gonna wait til we got here. Part of my story, you know. I guess now would be a good time to tell you all. Get comfy, it's a pretty long one".

Everyone took their place around the wolf dingo who proceeded to tell his tale…


	19. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

_What about now? What about today? What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?_

I was born in the outskirts of the city of Sydney. My mother's name was Kajura, and she was a pure bred dingo, which only about twenty percent of the whole population can say they're pure bred. She was a part of a pack, but she fell in love with my father, Takkon, an escaped gray wolf. When her family discovered this treachery of their bloodline they disowned her and so she and Takkon travelled together.

They came to the city, but they were good at keeping themselves hidden. Takkon did what he could for my mother, and loved her with all his heart. One day they were on a walk to relieve my mother's nerves, since dingoes get high strung when they're fixing to have pups. Some humans camping out saw them, and tried to kill my mother. People were afraid of dingoes after that incident when a baby was carried away and eaten by one. But at any rate, Takkon told her to run, but she wouldn't. She was afraid for him, and for her unborn pups. A human aimed a gun at her and fired.

But it didn't hit its mark. Takkon took the bullet for her. Only after that did my mother finally had it in her to run. She returned and supposedly buried the body in the sand later. I was born about a week after the incident.

My mother begged for her family to take us in, and I was the only pup she had. She tried to assure them I wouldn't be trouble, but they'd already decided that she "dirtied" their "perfect" bloodline, so she was turned away and shunned. But she didn't give up. I'm proud to say my mother was a strong dingo, who did all that she could for me, putting me before herself all the time.

But food in the city quickly became scarce, and hunting was hard to for her with a young pup to take care of. So…desperate times called for desperate measures. She allowed us to be found by humans. The zoo was called and they took us in.

Oh god…the zoo. Hated it. Hated it so much. They gave me the name Rusty from there, which was how I got the name I currently used, due to my then rust colored fur. I didn't get the sandy brown I have now til a little later in life. Anyway, it was there that I grew to absolutely hate humans, most notably children. I hated being called out by anyone for my strange look. I have dingo colors, but the body shape of a wolf, except my body's longer than a wolf's, and I wasn't as strong back then as I am now. I was lanky, still weak, a mere puppy. They often let kids come in and look at us. They'd laugh at me, right along with the other dingoes they had on display. During those times, I usually hid.

When the food shortage in the outside world was over, when I was about a year old, mother found a way out for us. We escaped together and I thought, for once, we were free. I was dead wrong…

Yeah, we were free for a short time, but things went from bad to absolutely worse. I thought I'd seen enough hate from humans. Oh no. What I got at the zoo was nothing compared to what I was about to get next.

Mother was teaching me to hunt at this age, young for a wolf, but perfect for a dingo. Just as we were in the middle of a lesson, I don't really remember what happened, but I remember feeling something like a shot in my side and the world went black…

It was dark when we woke. We were on some kind of concrete floor, possibly inside some box or something. We were trapped, but not in a box thankfully, but rather an old abandoned apartment complex that was supposed to be condemned by the city. I'd never seen my mother more afraid in my life and I feared for us both. She tried to keep a brave face but I knew something wasn't right. God knows how long we were held in suspense like that. We didn't know where we were or why we were there. We didn't know what was going to happen to us.

Then, all of a sudden, humans came in and grabbed my mother away. She tried to fight, to get away, but they used some kind of needle, some kind of chemical to put her to sleep. I hid for about an hour until they brought her out again. Upon opening her mouth, her canine teeth had been removed and I saw her claws had been dulled down to stubs. God what could this mean?! Would they do it to me, I wondered. I didn't know, but I stayed by her no matter what.

Shots rang out, and all we could hear was shouting and the sounds and cries of other animals. I didn't know if they were wolves or anything else, I couldn't see right. With what was left of her teeth, mother picked me up and carried me away, running as if in a great panic. I closed my eyes, tried to drown out the noise, but it was impossible. The humans were everywhere, and they were going to kill all of us.

Mother found a solitary room and put me inside an old cabinet.

"Whatever you hear, don't come out of there. Please, please my little love stay inside, and don't be afraid. You are your father's son, and I love you and so did he" she gave me a lick on the head.  
"Mama…I don't understand".  
"Stay inside. Don't come out for anything. Please…stay inside".  
"I promise" I said and whimpered as she again licked my face and closed the cabinet doors behind her.

I didn't see anything, but I heard everything. A human burst in the door, cursed my mother who snarled at the man. She lunged to attack and a shot rang out, hurting my ears. I heard the sudden, sharp yelp of my mother, then the sound of a heavy body being dragged away. My mother was dead…murdered in cold blood. And there was nothing I could do stop it.

I spent my second year of life in that world. Every day a fight for survival. The humans were damn cowards. They buzzed my fur off, took my damn teeth out and sold them for a profit along with my fur. Apparently for a time I was too valuable an asset to them to kill.

I grew to hate the world. This world had always hated me and was I to feel sympathy for those who wished me dead? Hell no! I vowed revenge. Revenge for my parents and revenge for myself and every animal caught in that hellhole! That's when…when I actually did turn into a killer. I started to fight back. I became the champion of the other animals who couldn't defend themselves. But always did I return to the room my mother was killed in, to the cabinet I was forced to hide in like a coward. It was another day, another night in hell.

Morning came and with it, hope. A new bunch of humans came in. They shouted loudly, so I didn't think them any different from the ones who hunted us. I snarled and emerged from my cabinet to see a man in a dark uniform enter my place of sanctuary. I lowered my head and snarled.

"Get out!" I said, but he didn't understand.

He got closer and every bit of fur stood on end, or at least what was left of it. In his hand he had some kind of stick with a loop at the end. He was trying to capture me. I lunged but he evaded me, and I fell right into the loop. I snarled and growled and tried to squirm out but it didn't work. The loop got tighter and I stopped moving. The man reached down and I growled still as his hand touched me.

"Don't be afraid, we're gonna get you out of here".

Freedom…at last…at long last. For the first time in a year or so…I saw sunlight. It was blinding but it was worth it. I was happy, I think, and finally free. They took me to a vet, and they discovered the damage to my teeth was permanent. They wouldn't grow back. My fur thankfully would. I was underfed, as I didn't really get to eat too much while I was there. The man, my rescuer he fed me, he would come to see me while I was still in the vet's keeping. He tried to think of a name for me, but couldn't.

And then one day…one day he brought her in. Madeline Aubrey was her name…she was six years old at that time and was probably the most beautiful child I'd ever seen in my wretched life. My past experiences with children weren't good ones, so I was still a little paranoid around her. But with her sweet smile and kind eyes I couldn't hate her. I couldn't fear her. She reminded me of what I lost, my innocence, my purity, the love I once had as a pup. It was something I couldn't describe but it was love and a need to protect her. I never wanted to leave her.

Soon enough, I was adopted by Madeline and the Inspector, Graham Aubrey was his name. They couldn't think of a proper name for me so they called me their last name, Aubrey. It didn't matter. I loved it and I loved them. He started training me to do police work shortly after my adoption and after that, I just left my puppyhood behind. All that mattered was my future.

Sometime later we were transferred to Alaska. I didn't like the change of climate but Maddie loved it and whatever she tolerated so did I. We lived in Anchorage for a little while and then came to Nome. She loved it here. She got her first sled here and tried to make me into a musher, but everyone here knows I was a police dog first.

Well, the typhoid broke out. Madeline was one of the first to get it. When…ugh…Steele and his team got lost, an investigation and search mission was brought on. Graham was head of the team and was desperate to help his daughter. I was desperate to help the part of me I sought so hard to protect. But a bear attacked him! One of those damn gone grizzlies, I knew I had to do something to help. Against his order, I attacked the bear before it could kill him and took it down a ledge with me. It crushed me under its weight, my back was broken. I must've hit my head because everything went black after that.

When I woke I was in a cave with a white wolf. I was paranoid again, as usual, as most wolves I encountered only caused trouble. But she told me to be still and rest. My back was severely injured and she was doing her best to take care of me. I wasn't a pup, I could care for myself but she insisted on me staying. I didn't really have much of a choice so I was resolved to stay until I was strong again.

She taught me the ways of the wolf. She knew what I was, oddly enough, as I'd never told anyone myself of my heritage. But she told me that wolves weren't bad, and that my father had been a good example of what a wolf should do, how they should behave. He died a noble death she said. I asked for her name and all she asked for me to do was call her Snowdrift. So I just went with it.

When I was strong again, I tried to make my way back into the town. Or at least when I thought I was strong enough. I found a wolf pack similar to Aleu's led by a kindly wolf named Black Eye. His other wolves couldn't stand me, called me things similar to those of the dogs from the town. Hell, I would've killed them had it not been for Black Eye's kindness, which I do feel bad for doing this, I took advantage of it. When I was hungry, he let me hunt with the pack. When I needed some kind of word of advice or such he was there to talk to me. Never did I expect to meet another wolf as kind as him.

We left on good terms. He wished me luck and I went on my way. But I had no clue as to how to direct myself. It seemed the further I traveled the more lost I became. Days dragged on and became weeks, and weeks became months. Still no sign of the town, but I'd heard the medicine was procured and the children were fine. So it was one less thing to worry about. But anyway, I met Saba while she was traveling with a pup and a bear attacked them. I wasn't about to let them get hurt or even killed. Especially not when a pup was involved. My instincts to protect kicked back in and I helped Saba fight it off.

We stayed with each other for some time, and I'll admit, I liked Saba. She had a good head on her shoulders, did what was best for Kanai. We had a somewhat similar history, though mine I'll admit was still darker than hers. I left before something happened that I didn't want to happen. I didn't want to trust them completely, I didn't want friends. I didn't need them. Because I knew in the end all I'd do is let them down. Again, I parted with them on good terms, though my reasons I kept to myself. I just hope one day I'll meet them again. But last I heard she's perfectly happy where she is.

I lived on my own in the wild for two years, letting myself live as a wolf. While on a hunt, I stumbled into another territory and that was how I met Aleu and Aniu here. Since meeting them, I haven't had a single lonely day. I consider them my family, and all of you as well.

**A/N: OMG! Longest chapter ever! Okay, I wanted to take a moment to tell you guys that part of the reason why I wrote this story was to make people aware of a certain type of hunting that's becoming a real problem across the world. I don't remember the actual term for it, but it's where wild animals are ordered and locked up in an abandoned building or something and hunters are allowed to come in and "hunt" the animals. These bastards will do anything in their power to kill these poor animals. I've even heard of a video where a lioness was led to her own death by the cries of her cubs, which is somewhat similar to what happened to Kajura. These people are sick and need to be stopped. So if you're suspicious about anything like that going on in your city or state or anything, please tell your local authorities and let them deal with the situation. Thanks a lot for reading, but I got a couple more chapters for you guys. Hope you like**


	20. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

_What if our love never went away? _

Everyone was stunned silent after the wolf dingo told his tale. For Rusty's part, he looked solemn and saddened. Aleu's heart broke all over for him. No wonder why he was so rough. The world had dealt him the wrong hand. Wolf, dingo, and man were all against him. He'd been alone, always alone. And the ones who loved him either died or abandoned him.

She knew he didn't want her pity, but by god he had it. Her ears bent down and she let out a soft, somewhat affectionate whine as she nuzzled his neck.

"I'm so sorry" she whispered so only he heard it.  
"Thus is life" he gave her a lick on her head, "Now, if you all would excuse me, I have something to take care of. It's something I'd rather do unaccompanied".  
"Rusty…".  
"Aleu, do try to understand. My reasons are my own. I need to do this alone. Pardon my…sudden departure everyone. Thank you for the meal, Miss Jenna. It was an honor to see you and your husband again".

Rusty quitted the house and made his way out to the street. Humans and dogs alike stared at him, whispered things. They seemed to recognize them after all, but nobody dared to confront him. God, had he really fallen so hard? Two years ago, people and dogs stayed away out of respect, now it was only fear.

"Well, let them be afraid" he thought, "I'm not the same as I was back then".

And it was true. He was older, his countenance stony, and his heart hard as flint. Then again, that could've been because Aleu and Aniu were with their family. In this moment, he was alone again, just as he'd always been. His feet took him down a familiar road, to a familiar street, to a familiar house and porch and then a red painted door. His old home…

"This is it" Rusty, Aubrey again, took the chain off from around his neck and using his teeth put the key in the knob.

The locks hadn't been changed and the door swung open for him. The house was bare. There was nothing, no trace of what once was there. He looked back, reminiscing on different things. He remembered how Graham Aubrey sat in his arm chair, smoking his pipe while Maddie played and snuggled with him on the rug at the end of a hard day. He shook his head, wanting to forget. Aubrey felt his heart harden again as a song came to mind.

"On the first page, of my story, the future seemed so bright. Then these things turned out so evil. I don't know why I'm still surprised".

He went into the kitchen where more memories surfaced. He recalled his food bowls, resting right by the fridge, near the cabinets where the pans had been kept, where Madeline always fed him, or even played in his food as he patiently waited for her to get done so he could eat. Always she came first. That was the order of things. He obeyed his alpha, Graham, and looked after the pup, Maddie. That was how he saw things.

"Even angels have their wicked schemes and they took that to new extremes. But you'll always be my hero, even though you've lost your life".

Telling his story had brought back nothing but pain. Sure most of his memories here were pleasant, but there was a sad side to happiness. The more he thought, the more painfully he was reminded that he'd broken his promise to Madeline, and worse yet, she was most likely gone because of him. And Graham had left him here. Even though, it wasn't entirely his fault. The good Inspector, like everyone in town, thought he was dead. Still though, it was hard not to feel embittered.

"They just stood there and watched me burn. That's alright because I liked the way it hurt. They just stood there and heard me cry. That's alright because I love the way they lied. I love the way they lied. I love the way they lied".

He turned away from the kitchen and made his way up the stairs. He paid no mind to the bathrooms, as he was never allowed to enter them. The first bedroom he entered had been a study and play room once. It was never used as a bedroom. Often times he found Madeline in this room playing with her toys and often invited him to play. His ears drooped as he entered the room and sniffed around. There was no trace of anything that had happened there. He sighed and laid down in the center of the room, feeling cold and alone.

"Now there's gravel in my voice. Glass was shattered from the fights. In that tug of war, they'd always win, even when I was right".

His life was a war, all the time. Even when he found Maddie. It was a war then of the mind and heart. He had a duty to the laws of Nome, but a personal duty to be guardian and playmate to Maddie. Never did the duties conflict, but still, it often hurt that when he was out on patrol he wanted to be at home playing with Madeline or resting next to her in her bed. Aubrey (Or was he Rusty in this moment? He didn't know) made his way out of the room and to the master bedroom.

It had been Graham's room. He didn't go in often. Never really had a need to. Sometimes he'd come in just to get a friendly pet or a kind word every once in a while. Sometimes he'd go in and wake the Inspector when they had to get up early for work. But besides that, he normally stayed out. It was a matter of respect. He wouldn't dare enter the alpha's territory without permission, though the rest of the house was his to do as he wanted within the alpha's reason of course. Which brought him to another room just down the hall from that bedroom…

"'Cause they fed me fables from their hand with violent words and empty threats. And it's sick that all those battles were what kept me satisfied".

He'd been a monster back then, back with the poachers. They'd drove him insane, taken his puppyhood away and deprived him of a life he longed for. A life of freedom. Sure he got his freedom in a sense with the Aubrey family, but it wasn't the same. He'd been happy, but not as happy as he could've been. Not the happiness a part of him knew now. But stuck back in his memories, in that world, it didn't matter. He was still a slave to them.

He'd fought them, killed and ate them. Yeah, that was something he wouldn't dare tell them. He hunted the hunters. Why? Well, they sure as hell weren't feeding him or any of the other animals. And…god he was ashamed to admit it felt…good! It felt so damn good to hear their screams of terror as he tore their throats open and tasted their blood in his mouth. Aubrey tried to leave that where it was, but now it couldn't be helped. Even here in his one-time sanctuary, his thoughts came back.

"They just stood there and watched me burn. But that's alright 'cause I liked the way it hurt. They just stood there and heard me cry. That's alright because I love the way the lied. I love the way they lied. I love the way they lied".

Her room was different. It was the center of conscience, the center of all that was precious to him. All that remained of her though was the stained glass window she loved so much. When they'd first moved here, it was her favorite room in the house simply because of its color. While the rest of the house appeared dull in her eyes, this room was multiple colors to her and she loved it. Though he could never see the colors himself, or at least only saw a few, it made her happy so it made him happy. He spent his nights here with her, snuggled on her bed, warming her and with it his own heart. The girl was his. She wasn't a pup like Aniu, but she was just as precious to him.

And he was her closest friend. She never hit him, never shouted at him. If she ever disciplined him it was for something he deserved most of the time. But he couldn't even recall a time she ever did. If she ever did he accepted the punishment gladly. Someone, he couldn't remember, said that man was god in the eyes of an animal. He supposed that was right with him and Maddie. But he didn't think too much about that. He loved them and would do anything for them to keep his humans happy. But that didn't separate him from who he once was.

"So maybe I'm a masochist. I try to run but I don't wanna ever leave 'til the walls are going up with all our memories".

And boy there were many of them. Too many good, but there were days when the bad outweighed the good. He was lost. Everyone he ever cared for was gone. The world he knew was gone, changed forever by the disappearance of his humans and those he loved. He felt like a pup again, locked in a cabinet, waiting for death. He closed his eyes and did something he hadn't done since he was a small puppy.

Rusty howled out in pain, hoping somehow, desperately, it would bring his Madeline back.

"They just stood there and watched me burn. That's alright 'cause I liked the way it hurt. They just stood there and heard me cry. That's alright because I love the way they lied. I love the way they lied. Oh…I love the way they lied…".

He hung his head in shame. Who was he to enter this place? Who was he to have ever been in that girl's life? He was a killer and he knew it, he just tried to hide it under his "honor code" which now meant nothing. What did hold meaning now? Aubrey was nothing now. Rusty was all that was left.

So caught up was he in his thoughts was he didn't notice someone else had made their way into the house shortly after him. Behind him a voice he knew sounded.

"Well look who's here…the faithful servant at his post once more…".

**A/N: I do not own the song Love the Way You Lie. I don't know why, but I really thought if I tweaked the words a little bit, it'd sound more like it suited his situation. Sorry if you guys didn't like it…but I couldn't resist. And yes, there will be another song in another chapter. Deal with it. Not the next one, but probably the one afterwards. Anyway, review please, much appreciated. **


	21. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find? _

Rusty turned, his head and ears perking up, and tail twitching in irritation. He knew that voice. That dreadful, horrible, hated voice. The wolf dingo immediately stood up, stiff legged now, head down and fangs bared, eyes burning with hatred.

"Bastard…" he snarled.

It was Steele. And god, he looked horrible. His once neatly kept fur was long and matted with blood. He looked somewhat emaciated, like he hadn't eaten in some time. Rusty thought he looked bad, but this fallen idol looked much, much worse. The malamute snarled back at his old nemesis.

More than once the two had butted heads. The only thing that had held Steele back from killing this miserable creature was his position as an officer of the law. If he'd killed an officer, a police dog, it would've been a mess. All this time, he'd thought the Inspector was dead, and so took temporary residency in the shed in the backyard. It was the ideal hiding place and no one disturbed him.

"I suppose I should welcome you home, seeing as how your little family's moved on. They forgot about you, Aubrey. The Inspector moved on without even a second thought to you".  
"Go to hell!".  
"Where do you think I've been living all this time?! Hm?!"  
"You wanna talk about hell?! Oh you haven't experienced it yet, dog!" Rusty snarled in a very wolf like fashion.  
Steele smirked. "You're more wolf like now. Tell me something, dingy boy, did the little half breed's daughter do that to you?!"  
"DON'T YOU EVER INSULT ALEU IN FRONT OF ME!" it came out almost like a roar.

Rusty reared up on his hind legs, almost like a horse and pushed the malamute down with his front paws. Growling harshly, he put his claws to Steele's throat.

"Bet…you don't know…what happened" Steele choked out, "to your…pretty little…girl!"

The wolf dingo pressed harder on his throat, determined to crush it slowly, painfully. He was making it harder for Steele to breathe, whatever wasted breath he had.

"Balto…he didn't…get the medicine…to her…in time…she's buried…here…the cemetery!".  
"WHAT LIES YOU TELL ME!"  
"No…no lies…not this time!".  
Rusty snapped his jaw above Steele threateningly. "Where is she?!"

For just a moment, the former cop dog took his paw off and let Steele up. He looked ready to attack again in case if the malamute decided to attack first. Steele spat in his direction.

"Piss off, old timer!" Steele growled, "Why should I tell you?!".  
"You can either tell me or I won't hesitate to floor you and kill you very slowly. I'm not afraid to. It's your call".  
"Oh please" Steele laughed, "You couldn't kill me back then, what makes you think I'll believe you now?!".  
"I'm not a cop anymore. And I'm not afraid to let the wolf side out for once".  
"I see…once a wolf, forever a wolf. Once a killer, always a killer. Is that how it is, Aubrey? Hm? To get leverage over one you kill. You were a monster then, you're a monster now. The only difference now there's nothing holding you back. Kill me now for all I care, but know this, it'll only tarnish your good reputation around the town".  
Rusty rolled his eyes and scoffed. "You think I care about my reputation now, Steele? You think I give two damns about it?! See, I'm not like you. I couldn't give a DAMN what people think of me! I'd be more than glad to end your miserable life! If my girl is indeed gone, I'm holding you personally responsible!".  
"Then what?! Will you end me then?! Hm?!"  
"I'd rather do it now and call it a day…Where is she?".  
"She's buried there, near one of the angels…Her stone is carved in the shape of a heart. Surely you can find it…now do it. Take your revenge!".  
"With pleasure!"

Rusty rushed at his enemy and pinned him to the floor. With a savage growl, he bit down on the malamute's throat, hard. Harder than he'd ever bitten anything.

_Stop this, Aubrey._ Snowdrift's voice sounded in his head, _You are not a killer.  
_"Stay out of this" he thought.  
_Let him go. He did not kill your child. It was the illness that took her away. Please Aubrey, let him go. What would Madeline say if you did this thing? How would Aniu react if she saw you do this? Think of them, think of your children, the ones you love. Speaking of which…_

"RUSTY!" Aleu screamed his name as she ran into the room looking mortified.

The wolf dingo released the malamute, but kept him pinned to the floor. He looked over at Aleu.

"He deserves this! You know it!"  
"No, no he doesn't! Rusty please…for god's sake let him go. Please, think of all the ones who saw the good in you! Please, please don't prove them wrong!".  
"He has…to do this…c'mon dingy boy! Take your revenge!" Steele urged, "He has to show you just how powerful he really is! Show you what a wolf he is! What a savage!"  
"Rusty…" she ignored him, "Please…This isn't the one I love. Please, come back to me. Don't do this, let him go".

Rusty looked from Aleu to Steele and back again. He wanted revenge, more than anything. This dog had caused a lot of people, a lot of dogs, a lot of misery just to make himself look good. But was revenge worth possibly compromising Aleu's love? And Aniu…god Snowdrift was right. The pup would never forgive him. He got off of Steele.

"Get out of my house. And if I ever see you again, you're mine. So you better hope someone else gets to you first" Rusty threatened and followed Aleu out.

"Thank you" she put her head under his, "They were right, and so was I. There's a lot of good in you".  
"I would've killed him had it been for you. Aniu…I never should've told her my story".  
"She's okay. She actually…feels bad for you. No one should have to go through the things you did. And I'm so sorry they treated you that way. I'm sorry about Maddie. But I'm not letting you go to her grave alone, not after that".  
"I'll be fine".  
"No. You've already been pulled out of the deep end once and I'm not letting that happen to you again. I won't…I won't lose you".

Rusty felt a little guilty at that. She was afraid she'd lost him. It was the first time in a long time someone admitted that. He gave Aleu a reassuring lick on her head.

"You'll never lose me, never entirely. I love you Aleu, and I would never do anything to hurt you. Please…let me go see Maddie alone".  
"I can't. Not after that. No matter what you say I'm going with you".

He couldn't sway her. As determined as he was, Aleu wouldn't leave him. In a way it was both good and bad. Rusty appreciated her dedication but in this case, it was somewhat annoying. But he'd tolerate it to keep her with him.

"Alright, let's go see her together".


	22. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

_What about now? What about today? What if you're making me all that I was meant to be? _

The walk to the cemetery was quiet. Aleu watched Rusty carefully, not fully trusting him or herself after his attack on Steele. Her beloved was still stiff in his movements, but it was hardly noticeable under the natural fluidity of his movements. His breathing was even, yet…different. He was anxious and in a way rightfully so. He'd just found out his girl was dead.

Aleu wished she knew how to comfort him, but it was a grief she couldn't quite understand. Humans had never fully accepted her, unlike what they did for him. She was sad for him, sad that he had to go through all this pain. They stopped at the iron gate.

"Are you sure you want to come in with me?" he asked.  
"Only if you want me to. I get it now that you wanna do this on your own and…really I can't stop you from going in. I just wanna help, Rusty".  
He licked her cheek. "I know, and you are. More than you know. I'll be back. I promise. Just wait for me here".

Aleu nodded and with that he made his way between the iron bars and entered the final resting place of his beloved Madeline. The world fell silent as he walked amongst the graves, the only thing audible was the breathing and soft beat of the wolf dingo's broken heart. He closed his brown-gold eyes and breathed out of his nose.

"I'm so sorry Maddie…"

_Aubrey!_

His ear flicked at the sound of the little voice. It was indeed little, young, but clear and lovely as a bell to him. Rusty turned his head and looked around everywhere, searching for the source. But it hit him. It was only in his mind. It was only a memory, nothing more, nothing less. In that moment he wondered: was it truly better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? He kept going, his mind going somewhat blank.

_Aubrey come home!_

"Someday" he'd promised, "Someday I would. That's what I promised her. I promised her".

Finally he stumbled across it, her tombstone. He read the words aloud and it was like the air had been knocked out of him. Rusty forgot how to breathe and it was like his reality was back to the nightmare it'd always been. A hole had been punched through the wolf dingo's chest, tearing his heart out. He cried once more, unable to hold back the tears anymore.

"Why?" he asked, hanging his head, "WHY?!"

He'd failed her, he let her down. God, how could he do that to her? How could he live when she was gone? What good was life, what good was his soul when the one who had brought it to the light no longer existed? He curled up in front of the heart shaped stone, and refused to get up. The wolf dingo shuddered with each sob, feeling more alone than ever and the only person who could comfort him was no longer there. She hadn't been in years.

Rain started to fall, but he didn't budge. He was in too much pain. He curled up tighter, wanting to forget the world and all around him. He hardly noticed a small hand brush against the fur of his head until a little voice started to sing to him.

_Don't you fret, my dear Aubrey. I don't feel any pain. A little fall of rain can hardly hurt me now. You're here. That's all I need to know. _

Rusty uncurled just a little and opened an eye. It widened when it saw the little girl he loved so much sitting there before him on the damp grass, her tiny hand on his head, petting him lovingly the same way she did before. Her hair was still blonde and eyes still blue as could be. Though he was colorblind, somehow, he'd always been able to see those eyes. His ears drooped and let out a soft whine, uncurling completely to let Maddie snuggle close to him.

_And you will keep me safe. And you will keep me close. And rain…will make the flowers…grow.  
_"You will live, Maddie. Dear god above! If I could heal you with words of love…"  
Maddie smiled. _Just hold me now, and let it be. Shelter me. Comfort me. So don't you fret my dear Aubrey…  
"I don't feel any pain. A little fall of rain can hardly hurt us now".  
_"I'm here".  
_That's all I need to know. And you will keep me safe.  
_"And I will stay with you" he licked her face sweetly as he did before.  
_And you will keep me close. _She petted his muzzle and face still with that beautiful smile of hers.  
"Until you are sleeping".  
_And rain…  
_"And rain…"  
_"Will make the flowers…"_

Then…she was gone. It'd only all been in his head, as everything else was. Rusty sighed and closed his eyes.

"Grow…"

Rusty got up and looked around, shaking the rain out of his fur, though why he didn't know as he was only gonna get wet more. He looked at the stone and gave it an affectionate nuzzle and lick.

"Goodbye my sweet. I'm so sorry I let you down. I miss you, and I will always, always love you. That I can promise and keep true to it".

With that, not without hesitation though, he left the little grave and made his way back down to Aleu who looked a little worried about him.

"Is everything okay?" she asked.  
Rusty looked down for a moment. "It's alright" he shrugged, "A little fall of rain can't hurt me now, love".

Aleu looked a little confused and the wolf dingo smiled. He licked her face again to reassure her he was fine.

"We need to get back. The little one's waiting on us I'm sure. And I know the pack will be missing us".  
"So you're going back with us?"  
"I already told you I would. There's nothing holding me here now. She…she let me go" Rusty admitted a little sadly.  
"You saw her?"  
"No" he lied, "I just heard her voice" it was a half truth.

What happened in that cemetery he would never forget as long as he lived and he would keep it to himself. Rusty shuddered with another sob that he kept quiet in his heart…

**A/N: Somebody please tell me Les Miserables fans in my reviewers? Hm? Anybody? Well if not, the song I used in this chapter was Little Fall of Rain from the musical Les Miserables. Doesn't really make me cry, but it does make me sad and kinda feel like the chick dying was kinda screwed out of her happy ending…anyway, I thought it'd be a good addition to this chapter. Again, tweaked the lyrics so it fit the chapter. I own nothing. Hope you like, please leave a review**


	23. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

_What if our love never went away? _

Jenna, Balto, and Aniu waited for the couple near the outskirts of town. They'd been showing Aniu their home but had some kind of sense, when Aleu took off suddenly that something was wrong. All three looked concerned, Balto especially. Rusty had a saddened look and Aleu looked like she herself was about to cry, but kept a strong façade for the one she loved.

"Inspector…" Balto regarded him with a hint of remorse.  
"Balto" the wolf dingo bowed his head respectfully.  
"I'm so sorry. I just…I tried to make it back as fast as I could and-"  
"It's irrelevant. I accept your apology, Balto. I just don't know what to say right now".  
"He loved you" Jenna assured him, "Graham. He didn't want to leave and after his recovery he went looking for you. But he assumed the worst. He lost everything. His daughter and his partner".  
Rusty sighed. "Did he leave nothing for me, in case I should come back?"  
"He left your old harness at the station. I could talk to the Commissioner and see about returning it to you" Balto told him.  
He shook his head. "No. The harness means nothing now. Nothing from this life does. But I am at peace with it. It's better if this town just…forgot me".  
"That's not true!" Jenna sighed, "Aubrey, you did so much good for this town. You're the best they've ever had. Surely you can't expect everyone to forget you. I never did".  
"I know, and your gratitude is more than payment enough. But all that is now is a memory, along with everything else here" he looked at Aleu, "With her, my life can start again".  
"Wait, what's going on between you two?" Balto looked a little suspicious.  
"Papa-"  
"It's…It's new" Rusty put his paw on Aleu's gently, "We're…kinda together. I mean, we're just starting out you know, we're still a bit nervous about stuff. I mean we haven't…you know…done anything if that's what you're worried about…oh god, that was wrong".  
"It's a little sudden" Aleu added, trying to make up for what her…boyfriend, she guessed, had just said, "But…we're taking it slow is what he's trying to say".  
"Yeah, that's it. Thanks, love".

Jenna stifled a laugh and Balto looked slightly amused. Aniu couldn't help herself and she burst out laughing. Rusty rolled his eyes a little irritated. But at least in all this, he knew things were going be okay. Everything was going to be fine. As long as he had Aleu, the shadows of the past were just that, shadows. Nothing else.

"When do you want to return to the pack?" Rusty asked later when they were alone, watching the night fall.  
"We'll give it some time. I'm sure they can last a few more days by themselves. I just wanna spend more time with my, well, I should say our family" Aleu smiled and licked his cheek.  
"I don't know if they've accepted me yet".  
"Trust me, they have. If papa didn't you'd know".  
"And your pack?"  
"Eh, they'll learn to get used to you. They need a male authority figure anyway" Aleu chuckled and put her head on his shoulder.  
"They aren't the only ones. Aniu…I owe her so much".  
"You owe her nothing. She loves you, and all she wants from you is your love. That's all both of us want".  
"And it's what you have. God, in all my years I never thought I'd find you. Someone like you, I mean. I mean, c'mon I'm about as old as your father almost".  
"Are you calling yourself old?"  
"Eh…somewhat".  
"You are not old! You're just…experienced. That's all. Tried and true" Aleu smiled proudly, "And I would have it no other way".  
"So I don't have to worry about anything like that being a problem?"  
The alpha licked his cheek. "Never. Why would I betray the perfect mate?"  
"Perfect? Nah, just…learning to live you know".

It was true. For so long he'd thought he was living. Life was what life was for him. Before the Aubrey family it'd been horrible bucket of traumatizing, emotional crap he had carry around with him for the rest of his life. But at least now, with this wonderful, beautiful girl by his side, Rusty was glad to say he no longer had to carry it alone. Who knew love really could fix things? Could make someone see so differently? He certainly didn't.

But did he ever truly know love before Aleu? Sure, he had the love of his mother and the humans who cared for him. But this was a different kind of love. This was…soul binding almost. It was like he was with the girl he was meant to spend forever with. He hoped that was the case, because Rusty didn't think he could go on much longer without her.

**A/N: Sorry for the short chapter guys, but this story is nearly done. I see about maybe one or two more chapters left and this'll be done. Oh, I got good news. One of my original stories on may be going to Amazon Kindle here in a few months. I just have to do some editing and stuff and it'll be good to go. I can't wait! So excited! But anyway, leave a review. Again, sorry for the short chapter. **


	24. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

_What if it's lost behind words we could never find? Baby before it's too late. Baby before it's too late. Baby before it's too late…_

They spent a week in Nome. Aniu grew close to her grandparents and Rusty spent his time trying to learn what it meant to be in a family. Aniu and Aleu agreed, the poor wolf dingo needed a lot, A LOT, of help. Sure his past had been, at least for the most part, reconciled. But the night terrors hadn't ceased. They always got worse when he spent the nights in the house.

Steele had fled. He found some other hiding place and Rusty was bent on making sure the malamute never desecrated his sanctuary again. Rage was still enkindled in the former police dog's heart. Rage at Steele, rage at the dogs of the town, rage at the humans, and even rage at himself. He still hadn't, and didn't plan to, told Aleu about his time in Australia. She didn't need to know that he himself had once been a man eater, no greater than any criminal or animal he hunted. Food had been scarce, and the damn humans weren't feeding them. What choice had he really had? Rusty shook off his thoughts as he laid in the faint light coming from the colored glass of the window.

His head raised when he heard the door creak open behind him. On impulse, he stood up and growled, stiff legged. But when he saw it was Aleu, he relaxed.

"I thought I'd find you" she said with a light smile.  
"Of course. Could you picture me anywhere else?"  
"Hm…I could think of something places. So…this was her room?".  
Rusty nodded. "Yes. She spent most of her time here. When I wasn't on duty I spent my days here as well".  
"Wow. I kinda wish I'd known her".  
"Oh you would've loved her. Madeline…she got along with everyone. Animals were her passion".  
Aleu's smile brightened. "She'd be proud of you now, Rusty. Or do you want me to call you Aubrey?"  
Rusty shook his head. "No. What was left of Aubrey died with Madeline. There is only Rusty left now".  
"Now that I don't think so" Aleu snuggled close to him, "You're hardly different from then I think. A little harder I'd imagine, but you've always been hard".  
"Only she could soften me, Aleu. Render me harmless".  
"Awww…I thought I could do that".  
"You do, but she did it first. For that I'll always be grateful to her".  
"I thought of something".  
"What love?"  
"Did you think maybe she brought us together? I mean, if it weren't for her, I don't think we ever would've met".  
"I doubt that we would've. Hell, I'd probably be dead if it weren't for her".  
"I'm sorry they were cruel to you, that everyone was cruel to you".  
"The world is a cruel place, Aleu. If one is to survive it, they have to be cruel themselves…to become savages. That's how I learned my motto: A lone wolf is either a survivor or a savage. At first or was and. But Black Eye changed that. A lone wolf can be either one. Savagery isn't always necessary for survival. It was you who actually drove that into my head. You, Aniu, and Madeline all saved my life, and showed me just how wonderful, how beautiful, life and love can truly be. You both made me feel…hope. Something I never felt. I'm never afraid to be myself around you or Aniu because of it. I once heard that love can change all hearts, and let me say that it is yours and Aniu's that ultimately changed mine".

Aleu's eyes stung at this confession. She loved this wolf dingo, this wonderful creature whose heart she tore open just by being who she was. Now he was here to stay. They'd never have to be alone again. Aleu pressed her lips to his in an almost human like fashion for a kiss. Rusty grinned, his yellow-brown eyes shining despite the darkness surrounding them.

"And they say my human ways are strange".  
"I'll admit, it'll take some getting used to".  
"Well my love, we've got all the time in the world. I'm not going anywhere. Anywhere you go I'll always be close, if not next to you".  
"I love you".  
"And I love you".

He leaned in for another kiss, which was simply met with Aleu's tongue. Rusty laughed and laid down again. Aleu took her place next to him, and he curled himself around him. God, he'd never noticed just how much smaller she was compared to him. He was long but jeez, he could almost wrap himself around her! But for once, he didn't mind. For the first time in a long time, he loved himself and he loved this girl snuggled in his hold. Soon they'd be back with their pack, and hopefully she'd lead him to a brighter future.


	25. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

_What about now? _

They returned to the pack some time later. The trio was welcomed back with open arms, even Rusty. Everyone saw a change in the strange creature. Rusty had a more authoritative air. He held his head high and posture straight. It didn't take long for the wolves to catch on. This male was an Alpha.

He appeared confident and indeed he was. In fact, Rusty hadn't felt this great since he was on the police force. He was once again where he belonged: in charge. But at least this time, he didn't have to lead alone. The wolf dingo stood on the hill where he originally contemplated setting foot in Aleu's territory, lost in thought.

_I told you time would be kind to you._ A voice said behind him.

Rusty turned and saw Snowdrift there. The spirit of the outlaw wolf smiled knowingly. He bowed his head in respect.

"And so it has. But I wouldn't have made it without your help".  
_All I did was fix your back and the part of your heart you hated so much. There is much love in you, Rusty. And now you must give that love to Aleu, and all who may come after you.  
_"I know. And I will. But I won't deny that I miss Madeline. But I need to know…Graham Aubrey, is he alright?"  
_He has suffered from depression but all is well with him now. He is at peace and so should you be.  
_"I am".  
_There is still a slight storm in your heart, young one.  
_"I'm partially in mourning, partially in bliss".  
_I see. But which is more prominent?  
_"My bliss. Aleu is my whole heart, and Aniu…I don't think I'd ever be able to live without either one. I love them too much. So in a way, Maddie's death was a blessing in disguise. She always told me in nightmares to find my home. I didn't understand it then. But now I do. Home is wherever those two are".  
"Rusty?" another voice, another one he loved, sounded.

He looked over and saw Aleu emerge from the woods, a gentle smile on her face. Rusty turned briefly to see the white wolf had gone. Poor Aleu probably thought he was talking to himself. Oh well…at least he got to see the old outlaw once before he became Aleu's official mate. He rushed down to her and almost knocked her over in his excitement and happiness. Rusty gave her a soft nuzzle against her neck and growled softly. For him there was no other girl. Only she could ever make him feel complete. Whole.

**A/N: Well that's the end folks. Sorry it's not much but it's whatever works right? Okay so yes I am planning a sequel to this, but I don't think it'll be posted any time soon. I'm working on my original novel and then I might have a Once Upon A Time fic in the works. So that's what's going on with me. Hope you guys liked, thanks to all who reviewed, followed, and favorited. **


End file.
